Have you ever had a repeated thought that will not stop? 

The process of continuously thinking about the same ideas is called rumination.

The best way to control rumination or negative thoughts is to distract your mind with other ideas or to find a way to resolve the problem. 

Just think – distraction or action. 

But it may not be as easy as it sounds.

If your circular thoughts prevent you from living life or going out, it’s time to take action. 

Whether you try counting or cooking, there are simple ways to help you get something off your mind.

What Does It Mean When You Can’t Get Something Off Your Mind? 

Our thoughts and our behavior are two of the things under our complete control. Or so they say. But occasionally, intrusive thoughts about unwanted events sometimes invade your mind and overwhelm you.

Whether you are worried about a past event or a potential encounter, negative rumination robs you of your present well-being, leading to severe problems like depression or anxiety.

Why do we ruminate on negative things?

• We are trying to solve a problem.
• We want to avoid a negative outcome.
• Our brains are in a feedback loop with our neurons repeatedly firing.
• We have developed bad habits of always focusing on the negative.

Why does my brain never stop thinking?

The problem with ruminating is that we inappropriately focus on the negatives – rather than the positives. And concentrating on negatives activates your fight-or-flight response.

The fight or flight or stress response triggers the release of hormones that prepares the body for a battle or a fast getaway.

In addition to physiological responses, the stress response shuts down your creative problem-solving thought process. 

You must completely disengage from the thought pattern to find a solution that will silence the problem. Humans, however, are not very good at stopping the thought process.

Experimental psychologists often refer to this as “the white bear phenomenon.” The psychological exercise is well-known. It refers to the belief that the deliberate suppression of thoughts makes them more likely to resurface.

If you are told to think of a white bear and then told to stop thinking about it, the white bear image will stay in your mind. 

The reason? The brain has no “Off” button. To minimize thought, you need to activate a different stream of thinking.

How to Get Something Off Your Mind: 19 Ideas for Letting Go

Holding onto a thought or problem can be overwhelming and debilitating. But there are things that we can do to redirect the mind.

As it is easier to stop a ball rolling downhill at the start, it is easier to stop ruminating thoughts when they first start than when they have gained speed.

And with a little effort and a little trial and error, we can minimize the ruminating process. 

Utilizing all the tools available, we have compiled a list of 19 ways to describe how to take your mind off something and begin to regain control over your thoughts.

1. Distract Yourself

Psychologists know behavior can change emotions. You can raise your emotional frequency if you do something that makes you feel better.

Once you feel better, thinking clearly and making appropriate decisions are more manageable.

2. Do a Puzzle

Accomplishing something, anything, can change our mindset.

Doing something that stimulates the logical and problem-solving portions of the brain also acts as a distraction task by simply giving you somewhere else to focus your attention. It also promotes well-being through the successful completion of a job.

3. Practice Mantra Meditation

Through the repetitive use of a calming sound or positive affirmation, Mantra meditation focuses our thoughts on the present and now.

We allow our thoughts to pass through the mind without engaging them during meditation. Even a short ten-minute session of mantra meditation and focused breathing can free your mind from persistent ideas.

4. Exercise Regularly

Exercise keeps us fit and strong. Vigorous activity also contributes to both good physical and mental health. It also encourages healthy sleep patterns. These are all things that contribute to positive health. 

Exercise also releases endorphins — feel-good chemicals that help us feel good and happy.

Also, most activities require concentration, distracting your mind from repetitive thoughts. Next time you can’t let something go, go for a run or a swim.

5. Laugh and Smile

It has long been held that laughter is the best medicine. Believe it or not, smiling makes you happy and scientific studies prove it. 

The brain registers muscle movement in your face when you smile and triggers the release of feel-good chemicals and hormones. 

A more optimistic outlook makes it easier to change how you think. This mood change, in turn, makes us happier – creating a positive feedback loop.

6. Discuss the Issue     

Talking can be helpful in a couple of different ways. Acknowledging that you do not know how to get something off your mind may provide enough assistance. 

Also, talking with someone you trust or are unfamiliar with the issue may provide perspective as to why you keep thinking about something.

7. Practice Journaling

Journaling intrusive thoughts may help get those ideas out of your head and down on paper. Sometimes called a worry journal, the act of writing gives you the perspective that ruminating does not allow. 

Journaling helps us tap the breaks in the body’s stress response to activate our parasympathetic nervous system –activating the rest and digest response and calming the body down after the danger passes.

It is also a safe way to revisit an issue, reframe and solve it. Once in your journal, you have complete control.

8. Clear All Triggers

If something in your life constantly reminds you of a thing, wrong decision, or person, clear your surroundings to remove all triggers. 

Clear out physical stimuli such as clothes, pictures, or keepsakes. Also, clear out the social triggers. Unfollow negative influences on social media, and change coffee houses, so these are not a constant reminder. 

9. Reframe Thoughts

If the issue persists enough to keep your thoughts involved throughout the day, try reframing the problem.

Like rewriting a sentence, this small action may help you change your perspective and even find a solution that you can live with — action is the antidote to anxiety. 

When you have a resolution to the situation, you will have both reduced the need for repetitive thinking and found something constructive to focus on replacing those circular thoughts. 

More Related Articles

Tune In To Your Emotions With These 15 Feelings Charts For Adults (Printables)

12 Of The Worst Negative Personality Traits That Are Truly Nasty

29 Of The Most Important Values To Live By

10. Organize Your Environment

Cleanliness has often been compared to a healthy mind or a peaceful state. It isn’t easy to know how to get your mind off something. 

However, a calming environment free from clutter can help you get into a more relaxed state of mind. Without the distraction of trash or clutter, your mind tends to focus more on positive thoughts.

11. Practice Gratitude

Many studies advocate the positive physiological and mental health effects of gratitude. Expressing gratitude allows you to live in the present and see the positives. 

This practice is contrary to repetitive thinking, which tends to focus on the negatives of an idea or situation.

Creating a blessings list each morning or simply saying thank you on your way to school or work are ways to express gratitude.

12. Practice Deep Breathing

A person can practice deep breathing anytime, without any specialized training. As the mind begins to race, the body’s natural response is to speed up the heart and breathing rate. A slow, downward spiral ensues, creating an anxious mind. 

Studies have shown deep breathing slows or even counteracts this process. And a person can practice deep breathing anytime, without any specialized training.

The MHA suggests that taking slow, deep breaths can reduce the stress response helping to quiet or stop repetitive thoughts.

13. Recite a Positive Mantra

It is usually negative thoughts that take hold and refuse to go away. You can break the reflective cycle if negative thoughts are replaced with a positive affirmation, such as things will work out. Increased anxiety, stress, and a type of self-fulfilling prophecy ensue.

Using positive affirmations also helps to make better choices and see things from a different and more positive light.

14. Read a Book

Reading takes concentration and effort versus watching a movie or TV show. Reading a book distracts the mind and allows us to enjoy new people and a new environment. 

As you read, you establish a buffer zone between you and your thoughts. Reading about far-off lands and different cultures helps contextualize your ideas. 

15. Learn Something New

Learning helps grow your mind, literally. New information and experiences create and expand the neural pathways of the brain.

Studies show that when we learn new information, the density of myelin increases – changing the makeup of our brains.

Even if you are not in school, try an app to learn a new language or solve a puzzle. Another way of distracting and refocusing your mind is to take a trip.

Whether it is a short drive or a weekend trip, new experiences will help redirect your thoughts. Learning refocuses the mind and enables you to achieve a more enlightened perspective.

16. Volunteer for an Hour

While the suggestions here about how to get something off your mind are varied, most follow the basic premise of distraction and perspective. If you can not change your thoughts, find a new environment. 

Volunteering is a great way to shift the focus from you to others and help your community. Take an hour or town and volunteer at the local shelter or animal hospital. Assisting others allows us to recognize that we live in a big world and may reframe repetitive thoughts.

17. Play Music

Music has long been known to influence thoughts, feelings, and behavior. Consequently, the idea that we can change our mood by changing musical genres is real. 

The works of Mozart have been shown to enhance studying and memory. Repetitive drums or chanting create a meditative state. And samba music makes us dance.

Music therapy is often used to promote emotional well-being and cope with stress. The psychological effects of music can be powerful and wide-ranging. Some research even suggests that musical choices highlight different aspects of a personality. 

In addition to listening to different musical genres, try learning a new piece if you play an instrument. The focus needed will help change your mindset.

18. Talk to Your Doctor

Racing or repetitive thoughts may have an underlying medical cause and is common in specific personalities, including perfectionists.

If you find it repeatedly challenging to calm your thoughts or distract yourself by some of the methods listed here, check with your physician.

Repeated episodes of racing thoughts, a low mood, problems sleeping, or increased anxiety can indicate organic issues and illnesses.

19. Try Aromatherapy

The use of aromatherapy is a well-known Ayurvedic and Traditional Chinese medical practice that dates back thousands of years. 

Concentrated essential oils are extracted from plants. These oils have aromatic properties that are used for therapeutic and medicinal purposes. 

Lavender is thought to be calming, according to research. Other therapeutic oils include sweet basil, orange, jasmine, and valerian.

Final Thoughts

As our days become more stressful, it is often hard to figure out how to get your mind off something. Incorporating one or more methods while focusing on the positives in our daily lives is an excellent start to controlling our thoughts.

Source link

The post 19 Ideas To Get Something Off Your Mind appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

With fathers day rapidly approaching (it’s on Sunday 19th June if you didn’t know) it’s time to start planning what to buy for your dear old dad. But men can be tricky so and so’s to buy for can’t they. I mean, how many pairs of socks and bottles of shower gel do they actually need!?!

With that in mind, we think the best fathers day gift you could give your dad is the gift of getting to spend more time with you. The pandemic saw us miss way too many family get togethers, celebrations, and milestones, and it reminded us that there is no greater gift than that of time spent with our loved ones. We also understand however, that turning up empty handed on fathers day doesn’t look too good. Which is why we’ve compiled our list of five ideas that involves both gifts and time spent together. We think your dad will love them!

Wine Tasting

If your dad likes a cheeky vino every now and again, but the reality is he wouldn’t know a Merlot from a Chianti, then we’ve got just the idea for you… a wine tasting experience.

Wine tasting can be done either at a vineyard; where the grapes are grown, harvested, and then made into wine; or in a tasting room at a private venue or bar. For example, Two Vintners has a tasting room where a small group of you can go along, taste the wine and then you have the opportunity to purchase any bottles of wine that you have particularly enjoyed.

And that’s the thing, wine tasting isn’t just about educating yourself about the different types of grape, the flavours, the pairings etc., it also offers you the opportunity to discover new wines that you might never have tasted or perhaps not even heard of before.

If you have siblings, you could all club together and make it a group thing and then treat your dad to some of his favourite wines to take home with him.

Private Jet

If you and your dad like the finer things in life and are all about the luxe lifestyle, then what about going all out and chartering a private jet to take you somewhere fancy. It might seem a tad extravagant, but hey you have only got one dad and it feels nice to spoil him every now and again, right?

There are companies, like Momentum Jets, who provide high end chartered jets or helicopters to take you on short haul flights to areas that may be hard to access with standard aircraft. Many people only consider the destination to be of importance, but we say the fun should begin from the moment you start your travels.

Why not see if your friends would like to treat their dad too and then you could all share the cost. Imagine the dads faces as you all drive to the airfield and they see what awaits them; they will get treated like royalty and you’ll get to enjoy the whole thing with them!

Drone Training

Boys love their toys, and this never really changes even when they’ve become fully grown men – the toys simply turn into more expensive gadgets and the latest modern technology. One of the most popular grown up toys is the drone, a small unmanned aircraft that’s operated from the ground by remote control. We think most dads would be over the moon to receive a drone as a fathers day gift (it appeals to the inner kid in them!) however, it’s worth bearing in mind that there are certain rules about owning them.

In some countries it is a legal requirement that you must have a license in order to be able to fly your drone. And you must also be careful about where your dad flies his new drone, as there are certain areas that are no fly zones, so do your research and make sure you pass the information on so that he doesn’t get himself in any trouble.

To truly master flying a drone it’s advisable to enrol in some drone flying lessons. You can click here for more info about drone training courses, which will help your dad improve his technical pilot skills and hopefully help protect both the drone and anyone crazy enough to get in its way!

Once he has got to grips with his fathers day gift, that’s when the fun can really begin. Most drones come equipped with cameras that can take pictures and videos of the aerial landscapes they fly over. So why not take your dad and his drone out for the day and see what visual masterpieces you can create together.

Pub Walk

Sometimes it’s the simple things that make for the best present, so what about treating your dad to a walk in the countryside with a few pub stops en route as a fathers day gift this year. This is where your map reading skills will come in handy, or failing that there’s always good old Google maps to help you out!

If you want to get your dad involved you could sit down and plan your route together, deciding between you how long the walk should be and how many pub stops you can fit in. Or if you would prefer to keep the whole thing a surprise, what about buying your dad a map and marking the route on it in coloured pen so that he can forever treasure your day and perhaps do the same walk again in future.

And of course, it goes without saying that seeing as it’s fathers day, drinks are most definitely on you. Cheers!

Day At The Races

No dad can resist having a bit of a flutter every now and again, so for our last fathers day gift idea how about taking him out for a day at the races. It’s the perfect chance to get dressed up in your smarts and live the high life for the day. Hey, you could even arrive in ultimate style and combine it with that luxury chartered jet we were telling you about!

Give your dad some spending money, set yourself a gambling budget (we want this to be a nice experience, so never bet more than you can afford to lose), and try and pick yourself a winner.

This gift idea is an odds on favourite and your dad will be smiling from ear to ear when the horse he’s backed comes over the finish line first.

Hopefully this selection of fathers day gift ideas will inspire you to find the perfect present that you and your dad can enjoy together. Happy fathers day to all the dads out there!

Source link

The post 5 Fathers Day Gift Ideas You Can Enjoy Together appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

You want to make your date memorable by setting the mood. You want to create a warm and intimate atmosphere where you can enjoy each other’s company and cast away the outside world for a little while. And if you’re looking for something different, these are some great date ideas that will give you something to talk about later.

Tips For Creating That Perfect Night Date

Walking

Walking is one of the most popular date ideas, and for a good reason. It’s easy to do, inexpensive, and leaves the door open for fun conversations. Plus, getting out of your house can help you feel more adventurous and less worried about how your date will go.

Cooking

Cooking is a fun way to practice your skills or learn new ones. You can bond over the food you prepare, and you might even learn something new about each other. Plus, cooking is messy, which means that no matter what happens while you’re in the kitchen, there won’t be any hard feelings when it’s over.

Wine Tasting

Wine tasting is one of the most romantic things you can do. It presents a fun and educational way to spend an evening with your partner while giving you something to talk about afterward. For a perfect excuse to get out of the house without going too far from home, wine tastings are great.

Dancing

Dancing helps you spend time together and get your hearts racing. It’s also an opportunity to bond, so it’s perfect for couples who don’t know each other well yet. You can dance any day or night, at parties, clubs, weddings, or even at your office Christmas party.

Karaoke Night

Karaoke night is a great way to have fun and enjoy some sweet serenades. But before you head out to the karaoke bar, you should know a few things: firstly, karaoke can be embarrassing, but that’s part of the fun! You’ll get up on stage with your partner in front of strangers and maybe sing songs, which will get some laughs out of everyone at the bar. You can also organize a karaoke party at home.

Picnic

The picnic is easy to plan and execute. You can eat anything in any fashion at any time. Going anywhere outside, like a local park with views of trees or waterfalls, will do fine. You may also want to consider areas where you can have some privacy from other people for a quiet time alone.

Dinner-Movie Night

When going to the movies, ensure that you order food you both like and pack a small bag with drinks and snacks. The movie selection is up to you. It can be something old or new, classic or popular.

Don’t Forget Dessert

Look no further than dessert drinks if you want to spice up your night and impress your date. Of course, you’ll keep the evening going with the favorite romantic dessert drinks we love: The Espresso Martini. These sweet treats are rich, creamy, and decadent, and the fact that they come in an array of flavors means there’s an espresso martini for everyone, no matter who you are with.

Stargazing

To ensure you and your date get the best view possible, find a place that isn’t lit up or a spot along the beach where there are no lights nearby. If it’s nighttime during the summer months, choose somewhere that’s open but has some shelter from trees and other foliage. If you’d like to bring a blanket to lie down on, this is also a good idea as it’ll make stargazing much more comfortable.

Massage Night

A massage is perfect for relaxing and connecting with your loved one. It can be a healthy activity that you do together and an intimate activity that helps you bond.

The perfect date doesn’t have to be expensive, and it certainly doesn’t have to be big. Sometimes, the most memorable dates are simple, intimate, and just for you two. Whether you’re looking for something low-key or something more adventurous, these awesome date ideas will make you fall in love with each other all over again.

Source link

The post Perfect Night Date Ideas To Crown Your Romantic Evening appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

Theoretically speaking, the bedroom should be the cosiest corner of your home. People usually sacrifice the most critical component when they are constrained by budget and size. How about if we tell you that you will not have to compromise on cosiness and that you can make your bedroom cosier on a budget.

We have got you covered if you are looking for inspiration to make your bedroom the most comfortable space. The definition of cosiness is different for all. Based on the taste of individuals and their personalities, it is subjective what is cosy for someone, maybe too much for another.

To make your bedroom feel universally cosy, all you need is the perfect lighting, a comfortable bed, and the right decor to make your space feel homier.

Mixing Patterns

To style a cosy room, you can use a bright-coloured wallpaper with bold pattern-on-pattern mixing. You can apply several possible strategies while mixing patterns to see which one is more attractive. Lastly, you can also use rugs of contrasting colours to add the final touch.

Floral That Looks Dreamy

To make your room look more dreamy, you can use wallpaper of a floral pattern to add cosiness to the space. To add more to your bedroom, you can have matching lamps at the bedside table or the nearby bookshelf.

You can add charm further by placing contrasting tufted pillows on the bed. Aromatherapy with essential oils makes the best combination for floral print. Visit here to buy aromatherapy candles that are safe for babies as well.

Wood Touches

Whether the space in your bedroom is tiny or oversized, if you incorporate wood patterns on the wall, it adds a sense of warmth to it. The choice of wood can vary; you can either use a simple board cladding or an elaborated oak panelling. Wood accents and furnishing will create the perfect cosy space.

Dramatic Bed

To give your bedroom the ultimate cosy feeling, choose to anchor it with a four-poster bed. If you don’t like frills or curtains, you can choose to add the streamlined version that has simple posts and no fabric or crossbeams.

Large-scale beds are highly recommended since they help dominate the entire bedroom. Click here to find some of the best beds.

Keep The Tech At Bay

You cannot unplug truly when you have tech scattered here and there in your bedroom, like an iPad or your Macbook. You should concentrate on making your bedroom a no- or low-tech zone by adding natural elements like indoor plants, flowers, a TV deck, etc. Make sure that you get to relax in this space instead of working even while in bed.

Personal Touch Helps

When it comes to your bedroom, you should add a personal touch to make the space yours, in a real sense. You can highlight some of your trinkets and memories to make the bedroom more unique.

You can display your collection of vases or keep the space simple by only adding a family photo.

The Bottom Line

When adding a dash of cosiness to your bedroom, you should think out of the box. Like, adding aromatherapy candles will make the space more relaxing and peaceful. Visit this website to buy pregnancy and newborn safe essential oil candles.

Additionally, soothing textures, soft earth tones, and rich wood accents are undoubtedly some of the best options for your bedroom.

Source link

The post 6 Cosy Bedroom Ideas! appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

You need solid intel on how to play hard to get with your crush.

You’re unsure where the sweet spot is between acting desperate and being a detached ice queen. 

How do you know if you’re playing hard to get or just pushing him away?

And if you don’t know the difference, how will he?

All you want is to be yourself and get to know him better, too.

So, how can playing hard to get help you with that?

Or can it? 

What Does It Mean to Play Hard to Get with a Guy? 

Playing hard to get isn’t about torturing your crush or letting him think you’re not interested. In fact, the best way to play this is to offer some encouragement. 

You’re not interested in mind games. So, you won’t do the following: 

• Set up a date with him and leave him to wait until he realizes you’ve stood him up;
• Call him up in the middle of the night just to see if he’ll answer and how he’ll react;
• Do everything you can get him revved up for something and then walk away. 

The goal here is to see if this guy is willing to put in the effort and take some risks to show you how he feels about you. 

Treat him the way you want to be treated.

How to Play Hard to Get: 11 Fun and Flirty Idea to Make Him Want You 

Read through each of these examples of how to play hard to get and picture yourself in each scenario. Which ones sound most familiar? And which are the most challenging for you? 

1. Don’t be available 24/7. 

You’re not a machine. And if you’re okay with waiting for his response, but you expect him not to be, that’s a problem.  

The playing hard-to-get texting rules are about boundaries. You have a life, and so does he. Unless his message is super-urgent (or unless he’s controlling ), he won’t write you off if you can’t respond right away to every text. 

If he does, thank him for showing you how little you’re missing. 

2. Leave your phone in another room. 

Or turn it off for part of the day. If you see a  text from him when you get back to it, chances are good he’ll understand that you were busy with something. 

It’s great when you both have time to chat back and forth in person or via text or phone call or whatever. 

But sometimes you need a break from your phone. Make it a regular thing. 

3. Keep living your life. 

Even if every fiber of your being wants to check your phone a hundred times a day, make yourself do something that puts the phone out of your mind. 

Remind yourself that you’ve got a life and purpose beyond your interest in him. You both need that. Do something just for you. And enjoy it. 

Even if he does text you, give yourself some time to breathe and think of the best response before you tap one out. 

4. Let him wait a bit. 

You probably did. That’s the beauty of texting: you can send each other messages without worrying that you’re interrupting something important, and the receiver can answer when it’s convenient for them. 

If you’ve always taken longer than a few minutes to respond to texts—because maybe you didn’t see it right away, or you were busy with other day-to-day life things—this is probably a non-issue for you. 

And if he’s really interested in you, this won’t be a deal-breaker for him.

5. Make an effort—without going overboard. 

Use a 2:1 interaction ratio to make sure he knows you are interested. For every two calls or texts he initiates, you initiate one.

Let him know the interest is mutual without blowing up his phone with random texts. 

It’s an ominous sign of things to come if you call him out for taking longer than a few minutes to respond to your “Whatcha doin’?’”  texts. Let him make the first move twice as much as you do. And give him a chance to miss you. 

Once you both know the interest is mutual and strong, you can step it up to a 1:1 interaction ratio. 

6. Spend time apart (doing your own things). 

You don’t have to spend all your time together. More to the point, you shouldn’t. 

If you send the message that your time with him is the only interesting part of your day — the only thing you look forward to — the pressure is on to spend more and more time with you and to make sure every waking moment lives up to your expectations. 

That’s not fair to either one of you. You need to be able to enjoy your time apart from him, just as you need him to be able to enjoy his time apart from you. 

7. Work on your self-confidence. 

Confidence is sexy. And it’s way less stressful than the opposite. If you can enjoy your own company, chances are good he’ll pick up on that and want to spend more time with you. 

You don’t need his validation and affection 24/7 to know that you’re awesome, etc. That’s your job. Don’t make it someone else’s. 

There’s nothing wrong with your wanting him to notice and be proud of you. It’s another thing, though, to base your self-esteem on what he thinks.

8. Make time for self-care.

Self-care isn’t just warm baths and facials. Do the things that nourish you physically, spiritually, and emotionally. If you don’t honor your own needs, don’t expect anyone else to.  

Check out Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and make a checklist if it helps.

As for wants that go above and beyond the basic, universal stuff, don’t expect him to figure that out for you. He’s not a mind-reader (any more than you are). If you want him to take the time to get to know you, do that yourself, first. 

Knowing yourself will make it easier for him to know you, too. 

9. Give him a chance to chase you.

Even if you pride yourself on being a modern woman, if you’re doing all the chasing, at some point, you’ll wonder, “If I hadn’t chased him, would he have bothered chasing me?” 

Let him find out for himself whether he wants you badly enough to go after you and take some actual risks to win you over.  If he doesn’t have to, he probably won’t. 

If he thinks he’s got you in the bag, you won’t know if he’s with you because he wants to be or because you want it more than he wants to be alone. 

101 Of The Best Flirty Questions To Ask A Guy

113 Sweet And Sexy Deep Love Messages For Him

101 Intimate Questions For Couples

10. If you go somewhere together, work the room. 

If you go to a social gathering together, don’t stay glued to his side, even if you don’t know anyone else there. Show your independence and look around for people who look like they might appreciate some company. Mingle. Find some common ground. Repeat. 

Show your date you don’t need him to hold your hand throughout the evening. You’ve got untapped people skills. Use them. 

Give him a chance to call you back to his side so he can introduce you to other people—not because you’re right there already but because he wants you there. 

11. Get to know him better before having sex. 

Don’t be in a hurry to get naked with this guy. If you want more than casual sex with him, slow down. And see how he takes it. 

Even if you feel like you two have a special connection, give yourself time and enough distance to figure him out when you’re not looking at him and thinking, “Now’s good. Thinking is overrated. C’mere!” 

If you’re not 100% sure you’re ready, save it for another day. If he’s a jerk about it, say goodbye and high-five yourself for dodging a bullet. 

Does Playing Hard to Get Work? 

If you play it the right way, and if this guy is really into you, yes, this will work. 

As long as you don’t take his interest for granted and play games with him, he’ll be intrigued if he sees that you’re definitely interested in him but that you also have a life you fully intend to keep living — whether he likes it or not. 

Maybe you want him to be a part of your life, but you’re also independent and confident enough to be okay if he doesn’t want that the way you do. You’ll take the hint and move on.  

Keep in mind that might be precisely what you need to do. Trust that if the interest is mutual, he’ll find a way to show you. 

You can both take it from there. 

Now that you know what it means to play hard to get — in a way that actually works — what points in this post stood out for you? And what will you do differently today? 

Source link

The post How to Play Hard to Get (11 Ideas to Make Him Want You) appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

If you made a resolution for 2022 to lose weight and get in shape, you may be searching for tips and new weight loss recipes to try! Luckily, we’ve got you covered for the morning with some delicious, high-protein breakfast recipes to help you shed those pounds.

Continue reading to find a recipe you’d like to try, and for more healthy weight loss recipes, check out 22 Meals to Melt Belly Fat in 2022.

These healthy muffins are packed full of protein from eggs, oats, Greek yogurt, and protein powder, which can be a huge help with your weight loss goals. And not only that, but these will take you less than 30 minutes to make!

Get our recipe for protein muffins.

RELATED: Sign up for our newsletter to get daily recipes and food news in your inbox!

We love these waffles not only for their protein content (which comes from Greek yogurt, protein powder, and oats), but also because you can easily make them with chocolate!

Get our recipe for protein waffles.

This paleo smoothie is great for weight loss because of its clean ingredients, protein, and low sugar content.

Get our recipe for paleo smoothie.

Oatmeal is one of the best breakfasts you can eat for weight loss because of its high fiber and protein content. This recipe tastes naturally sweet from the bananas without the added sugar.

Get our recipe for peanut butter oatmeal.

RELATED: 6 Oatmeal Habits That Help With Weight Loss, Says Dietitian

Black beans are a high-fiber food, which makes them a great choice for losing weight. These mixed with eggs will give you a delicious protein boost to start your day.

Get our recipe for black bean omelet.

A hearty breakfast burrito like this one is the perfect way to start your day and match your weight loss goals. The beans will provide you with fiber and protein, the chorizo will give you a protein boost, and the whole burrito will keep you full and satisfied throughout the morning.

Get our recipe for breakfast burrito.

This gluten-free, lean protein recipe is a great weight loss breakfast choice. The combination of protein powder, almond butter, and oats will give you that healthy energy boost to keep you motivated to eat healthy throughout the day.

Get the recipe from Cotter Crunch.

These egg muffins are so quick and easy to make, and their clean ingredients and extra protein from the eggs make for a great weight loss breakfast.

Get the recipe from Well Plated by Erin.

And finally, this fully vegetarian sweet potato wrap is a nice choice for a lean, protein-filled breakfast to have in the morning. You’ll feel full for hours and won’t be tempted to reach for the mid-morning snacks.

Get the recipe from Ambitious Kitchen.

Read this next:

Source link

The post 9 High-Protein Breakfast Ideas to Help You Lose Weight — Eat This Not That appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to remind your partner just how much you love them. But planning a trip with the person you love can be stressful and overwhelming, especially if it’s your first time. When it comes to planning a romantic getaway with your significant other, you want everything to be perfect and memorable! So, what does that mean? It means that you need the right location, ambiance, and activities. You don’t want it to be too over the top, but you also don’t want to skimp on anything.

A romantic trip can be as simple as a quick day trip to a nearby city, or as extravagant as a round-the-world tour. The important thing is to find out what your significant other wants and then give it to them.

A Countryside Picnic

Going on a picnic is a wonderful way to celebrate Valentine’s Day. It allows you to spend quality time with your partner in a beautiful setting, and it doesn’t require a lot of preparation. Picnicking can be as relaxing or as exciting as you want it to be. The first thing you need for a good picnic is food, so start preparing some food items. But don’t prepare too much because you will have to carry it all by yourself, so keep it light. Make sandwiches of bread, fish or chicken. Make some salad or fruit salad to munch on while you are resting on the grass. Of course, bringing some wine will romanticize the occasion.

Last but not least, choose a nice patch of grass with some nice shade and prepare to have a romantic and relaxing Valentine’s day with your loved one.

Exploring The City

This might sound like a strange idea, but going out and exploring your own city with your partner may be more exciting than you think if you both try and get into the tourist mindset. Imagine you’re both mere visitors and walk around, try the cuisine, the café’s, book a dinner reservation at a great local restaurant, go all out for this day. Planning a Valentine’s Day date in the city with dinner is a great way to save money, and still have a lovely evening with your significant other.

Planning a date night doesn’t have to be expensive. There are plenty of ways to enjoy a romantic night without spending a lot of money.

Paris

Your partner is a special person in your life, and you want to make this Valentine’s Day special. That’s why you want to find a romantic location that’s perfect for spending the day with them. One of the most beautiful places in the world to spend a day with your significant other in Paris, France. It’s a European destination known for its romantic scenery, good food, and endless amounts of culture.

If you’re not great with planning and don’t really know the city that well, you should consider professional help, like the tour guides at Hellotickets, who provide great options both for Paris and many other romantic getaways. With all of the things to do in Paris, it can be hard to pick the best things to do for Valentine’s Day there. You can start off by enjoying a romantic cruise on the river Seine. You will pass by many of Paris’ iconic sites including the Eiffel Tower, Louvre Museum, Notre Dame Cathedral…

Camping Trip

Valentine’s Day is coming up, and you know what that means… campfires, s’mores, and romance in the air. Making your Valentine’s Day special this year? Make it a camping trip. Get out of town with your significant other, pack up all of your gear, and enjoy the peace and serenity of the outdoors. This also may seem like a funny idea for a romantic getaway, but going for a short camping trip may bring you closer together than ever, and spark a great romantic feeling.

A Romantic Gift

Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate love and affection for your partner. The day is celebrated in different ways around the world based on culture, religion, and tradition. It doesn’t matter whether you are married or not, Valentine’s Day is a perfect opportunity to show your love and affection to your loved ones. A cute way to declare your love is through a candy bar wrapper with a personalized message and a picture of the two of you together. You can use a ready-made kit or create your own from scratch. Just print the design onto colored paper, stick it onto the ready-made wrapper, and voila! It’s easy and sweet.

Tips For Success

1. Set a nice dinner table
2. Pick a nice restaurant with great food and ambiance
3. Make sure you have flowers on the table, but don’t forget the chocolates too!
4. Listen to each other and try to remember how and why you fell in love in the first place
5. Enjoy having one-on-one time, learn about each other even more.

A romantic getaway can be a great way to spend some time together. Planning the trip can be fun, but it can also get stressful pretty quickly if you’re not careful. We hope these suggestions will help you plan a fun and memorable trip together!

Source link

The post 6 Ideas To Start Planning A Romantic Valentine’s Day Trip With Your Partner appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

Everyone needs at least one day of the week to recharge for the days ahead. 

If Sunday is a day off for you—and the days afterward are not—a self-care Sunday could change everything.

Whatever day you pick, though, you now have our list of 29 self-care day ideas to choose from. 

Plan your self-care day ahead of time to give yourself something to look forward to.

And don’t be afraid to try something new. 

What is Self-Care Sunday? 

For many of us, Sunday is the day that sets up the whole week. It’s the day before we go back to work or school (or both). So, it makes sense to keep a list of your favorite self-care things to do. 

If you’re still on the fence, consider what a weekly self-care day could do for you:

• Give you a chance to honor needs neglected over the past week.
• Restore energy for the week ahead
• Help you manage stress by providing an outlet and a chance to relax. 
• Improve your relationships with others
• Help prevent burnout and boost overall well-being

Self-care isn’t selfishness. It’s not about making a habit of putting your needs ahead of everyone else’s. The plain truth is you can’t pour from an empty cup. You need to fill your own tank before you can tend to the needs of others. 

How will you fill your tank this week? 

29 of the Best Self-Care Sunday Ideas 

Get ready to transform your Sunday routine by adding any combination of the following self-care activities. Look through the list and choose some favorites, along with something new. 

1. Turn off your alarm. 

If there’s ever a time to turn off your morning alarm and catch up on your sleep, it’s Self-Care Sunday. If you don’t want to sleep in too late, consider setting your alarm at least an hour later. 

2. Write in your journal. 

Take at least a few minutes to check in with yourself by writing in your journal. Give your noisiest thoughts an outlet, so you can make sense of the noise and think more clearly.

3. Curl up with a book. 

You know that book you’ve been wanting to read but haven’t had time for? This is the day to carve out some time to sit in your comfiest chair and do some reading—just for fun. 

4. Write a story of your own. 

If you enjoy creative writing and want to craft binge-able stories of your own, Self-Care Sunday is a great time to start your next epic tale and get acquainted with its characters. 

5. Make time for meditation. 

Whatever type of meditation you prefer, make meditation one of your top Sunday morning activities to get your head into the best space for whatever comes next. You don’t have to be an expert to reap the benefits.

6. Do some yoga. 

Use an app or find a YouTube video with an instructor you like. Go to a room where you can move through the routine without spectators or interruptions. Even a few minutes of yoga stretching can do wonders. 

7. Take a long, therapeutic soak. 

If you like baths, gather your favorite bath accessories—bath salts, loofah, essential oils, candles, music, etc.—and make time for a long, restorative soak. For extra credit, prepare a soothing drink to enjoy. 

8. Use a face mask. 

If you’re like me, you have a few of these in your bathroom drawer. Prepare with your favorite skin cleanser and apply the mask, waiting 15 to 20 minutes before gently peeling or rinsing it off.  

9. Create a home spa. 

Go beyond a simple face mask by creating an at-home spa experience involving any combination of skincare treatments. Finish with a moisturizer that nourishes and hydrates your skin from head to toe. 

10. Take a nature walk. 

Get outside for fresh air and exercise and take in the sights. Enjoy the variety of trees or whatever nature you have in your neighborhood. You can even walk somewhere new and do some exploring. 

11. Learn a new relaxing hobby. 

Check out this list of 21 relaxing hobbies to try—or spend time on one you already enjoy but haven’t had time for during the week. Do something that lowers your blood pressure and helps you feel at peace. 

12. Try a new recipe. 

This Sunday is the day to try that new recipe you’ve been curious about—or figure out how to prepare your own Indian food buffet. Bake your favorite cookies and share some (but not all). 

13. Watch a favorite movie. 

Pick out a favorite movie and prepare your favorite movie snacks and a soothing drink. Self-care Sunday doesn’t have to be productive. The goal here is fun and relaxation. Choose a feel-good movie for the best results. 

14. Play a (new) favorite video game.

If you love playing video games—or you live with someone who does—you can spend some time learning how to play or brushing up on your gaming skills. Just make sure it’s more fun than stressful. 

15. Shop for something fun. 

You can shop online or visit a favorite store. Start with something you know you enjoy looking at (electronics, books, shoes, etc.) and browse to your heart’s content. Think of it as research or idea-gathering.   

16. Hang out in a local bookstore. 

Browse the bookshelves or look through the magazine selection. Find a comfy chair and do some reading. If the bookstore has a coffee shop, treat yourself to something soothing. 

17. Spend some time in the sun. 

Soak up some vitamin D by spending some time outside—walking, sunbathing, or going on a picnic. Find a spot where you can take a moment just to enjoy the warmth of the sun’s rays.  

More Related Articles

List Of 600 Personality Traits

How To Write A Personal Mission Statement (And 28 Mission Statement Examples)

33 Good Mottos To Live By For A Stellar Life

18. Go on a trip—or plan one. 

If you don’t already do enough driving during the week, a road trip might be just the thing. Otherwise, you can research travel options and plan your next dream vacation. 

19. Light a candle (or a few). 

If you find candles relaxing, light a few where you can see them and enjoy the glow. Woodwick candles make a faint crackling sound you might enjoy. Play it safe and burn each candle for four hours at the most. 

20. Tidy up your space. 

For many of us, a clutter-free home is more relaxing than a messy one. Tidying up doesn’t have to take a massive amount of time or energy, and the payoff is something you can enjoy during the week.

21. Plan your week. 

Getting your week all sketched out—at least roughly—can help you feel more on top of things, which allows you to manage stress and feel better about the days ahead. 

22. Get a good night’s sleep. 

Retire early to get a good eight hours or more of restful slumber before you wake up for your Monday morning routine. Your brain and body will thank you for the chance to heal while you sleep. 

23. Plant something. 

Weather permitting, you can plant something outside— in a garden or a planting container. Indoor gardening is also an option, whether you’re growing kitchen herbs or propagating houseplants. 

24. Delegate a dreaded task.  

If doing the laundry is something you dread, consider delegating it to someone else in exchange for a task they dread but that you don’t mind so much (maybe sweeping the floor or preparing a meal). 

25. Indulge in a favorite food. 

This could be a meal, a snack, or a dessert. Order in or go out to enjoy a meal with family or friends. Don’t forget to tip the person delivering your food. They make this kind of fun possible. 

26. Spend some time with a favorite person. 

Make time to connect with someone you love (or multiple someones) and enjoy a meaningful conversation with them. Or, if you’re both all talked out, enjoy some companionable silence together. 

27. Write a letter to someone you love. 

Treat someone you love to a written letter updating them on your life and checking in on theirs. Use fancy stationery or basic printer paper. What you write on it is what matters. 

28. Enjoy some laughter therapy. 

Watch, read, or listen to something that makes you laugh, especially if your week is generally laughter-free. Laughter’s healing benefits include better heart and respiratory health and improved body chemistry and brain function. 

29. Listen to your favorite music. 

Enjoy a favorite playlist—either as background music or an excuse to try some new dance moves. Bonus points if you sing along or play along on a musical instrument of your own. 

Now that you’ve seen all 29 Self-care Sunday ideas, which ones stood out for you? And what will you do differently next Sunday?

Source link

The post 29 Self-Care Sunday Ideas ( Body And Soul Soothing) appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

Do you know how to cheer yourself up when you’re feeling low?

Some days it’s harder than others, right?

And on those days, even if you know “I need something to cheer me up,” you just can’t turn it around.

Perhaps you need something you haven’t tried before.

You’re a creature of habit, but you also thrive on variety.

And with 41 ideas to choose from in this post, you’re sure to find more than a few things to cheer you up.

How Can I Lift My Mood?

If you’re feeling blue or down on yourself, you don’t have to wait for a magical mood shift to happen. You do have some control over your emotions and how they impact your day.

Barring your having clinical depression or a life tragedy, the quality of your thoughts and actions can determine whether you languish in the doldrums or feel a skip in your step. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

• Don’t let yourself sink further into a bad mood by doing nothing. Positive action always makes you feel better.

• Refrain from judging your negative emotions and shaming yourself about them. That only makes you feel worse.

• Remember that moods are like storm clouds — they eventually pass. If your efforts to hurry them along don’t work, just be patient. They will pass in time. If not, you may need the support of a counselor or doctor to address what’s going on.

For now, you have an arsenal of ways to cheer up with our list below. That alone should make you feel a little better!

List of 41 Things to Cheer You Up

1. Write a letter to yourself (or someone else).

Open a Google Doc or grab a notepad and pen to write yourself a heartfelt message. Acknowledge any pain you’re dealing with, and remind yourself of your why.

2. Donate to a cause you care about.

Send some money to a cause you believe in and want to support. You can also encourage others to support it and explain why the cause is so important to you.

3. Make a gratitude list.

Write a list of things you’re grateful for. Write whatever comes to mind and include as much detail as you like. Recall how you felt when those good things came into your life.

4. Listen to some energizing music.

Play some music that makes you feel lighter on the inside. Play it while you’re writing or reading a good book or use it keep you motivated while you’re tidying up.

5. Write down your thoughts.

Write down whatever is on your mind. Sometimes you can’t create something new or get anything done until you allow yourself to express thoughts you’ve been pushing back.

6. Make a list of moments you’re proud of.

Write a list of accomplishments you’re proud of. Think of things you’ve done even when fear tried to stop you. And remember how you felt when you pushed past the fear.

7. Write a bucket list.

Write a list of things you want to do before you take your last breath. What have you always wanted to do? And what could you do today to get closer to one of those things?

8. Spend time with pets.

Spend some time playing with your pet/s or doing something special for them. Buy your dog a new toy and play with them or enjoy watching them play. And talk lovingly to them.

9. Take a walk.

Go for a walk in a pedestrian-friendly place — whether that’s downtown or down a long country road. If you’re in the mood, bring a picnic lunch to enjoy along the way.

10. Enjoy a favorite meal.

Treat yourself to a favorite meal. If you like, you can invite a friend or family member to join you. Don’t forget to leave a generous tip for your waiter.

11. Take a power nap — or meditate.

Try taking a 20-30 minute power nap. Or pop in your earbuds for 20 minutes of relaxing meditation using a brain entrainment recording.

12. Watch something that makes you laugh.

Think of shows or comedians who make you laugh, and block out some time to just sit and watch or listen. This could also be a storytelling podcast or a favorite radio show.

13. Color your hair.

Either set up an appointment for a full or partial foil or — if you know what you’re doing — buy an at-home hair dying kit. Choose a color that makes you feel more confident.

14. Dress up.

Sometimes, just dressing up is enough to make you feel more like yourself. Wear clothes that make you feel more attractive and allow yourself to be seen in them.

15. Spend some time outdoors.

Go outside and enjoy the fresh air, the trees, the birds, the falling leaves, the sunshine, the snow, the wind, the flowers, or whatever calls out to you. Pay attention to details.

16. Go for a swim.

Go for a swim and enjoy the feeling of buoyancy, the warmth of the air (if it’s indoors or during the summer), and the hush of gliding underwater.

17. Enjoy a hot, sudsy bath (or shower).

Get some bath or shower soap in a scent you like and enjoy a long, hot soak or shower. Finish off with some moisturizer to keep your skin hydrated and smooth.

18. Sing (or sing along).

Sing along to some favorite songs or sing them on your own — with or without company. Maybe make sure you close the windows first (neighbors).

19. Watch an old film.

Pick an old black and white film to watch. Make some popcorn or another favorite movie-watching treat. For extra credit, use this as a reward for finishing a task or two.

20. Exercise.

Even a short workout (under 10 minutes) can boost your mood and metabolism. Going for a walk counts, too. Reward yourself with a healthy snack or other self-care.

21. Donate old clothes, etc.

Go through your closet and remove anything you haven’t worn in a year or more. If it’s still in good enough shape, donate it — along with anything else you don’t need, use, or love.

22. Prepare a good meal.

If you feel comfortable doing this, save the cost of eating out by preparing a favorite meal for yourself and, if you like, a special guest. Buy some fresh flowers for the table.

23. Make a wish.

Light a candle for a special dessert and make a silent wish — eyes closed and with a gentle smile. Then blow it out, trusting your wish will come true if it would do you good.

24. Take a chance.

Do something that scares you if think it could change things for you in a good way. Take a risk and learn what you can from the experience, whatever happens.

More Related Articles:

13 Of The Best Women’s Retreats For 2021

31 Fun Things To Do By Yourself

65 Fun Things To Do At Home To Banish Boredom

25. Meet some friends for lunch (or drinks).

Meet a friend or group of friends at a favorite place for food or drinks. Enjoy catching up with each other, and plan your next meet-up before parting.

26. Order in some dinner.

If going out isn’t an option (or if you’d just rather not), order in something you enjoy — whether it’s Chinese, pizza, sandwiches, or something else. Savor every bite alone or with company.

27. Hug someone.

This works best if you’re hugging someone who wants to be hugged, so it can’t hurt to ask first. When you comfort someone else with a hug, you can’t help but feel comforted, too.

28. Break from your routine.

Take a break from your usual routine and do something fun. This is especially helpful when you feel stuck. If every day is the same, make this one different.

29. Create a vision board.

Get some poster board and look through old magazines for pictures and words to cut out and attach to it to your vision board. Or create a slideshow with Microsoft PowerPoint using images online.

30. Send a postcard to a faraway loved one.

Choose a postcard from a favorite place in town, write a thoughtful message on it, and send it to a loved one who lives far away. They’ll appreciate it, and you’ll get a vicarious boost.

31. Go shopping in a new store.

Walk into a store you haven’t visited yet. This could be a store someone recommended to you or just a place you’ve seen in passing. If it helps, buy something to keep or give as a gift.

32. Rearrange your furniture.

Sometimes just changing the look of a room you spend a lot of time in can help you let go of things you no longer need in your life — and make room for what you do.

33. Start a new home improvement project.

Maybe you want to paint a room, add a new framed picture arrangement, or upgrade the flooring. Whatever it is, do something today to get started with it.

34. Plan a trip.

If you could go anywhere in the world — or in your home country — where would that be, and what would you do there? Get a map and start planning your trip.

35. Tidy up and add something new.

Tidy up a room you spend a lot of time in to refresh it and make it feel more open and spacious — and less burdened by its past. What you do to your space, you do to yourself.

36. Have a good cry.

Sometimes, you just need to let yourself cry. If making time for it isn’t enough, try writing down the thoughts you keep pushing back and the feelings that go with them.

37. Find a pet.

If you’re able to care for a pet animal, find one that fits your personality and lifestyle. Choose one that chooses you back. And prepare a special place for them in your home.

38. Revisit an old hobby.

Maybe you haven’t knitted or crocheted in a while, but you see a new yarn you’d like to try. Buy a skein and use it to create a small item you can enjoy or give to someone as a gift.

39. Do some research.

Do some digging on a subject of interest and document your research. If you have a blog and you learn something others would find useful, consider writing a blog post about it.

40. Read a good book (or listen to one).

Choose a novel or nonfiction book that interests you and block out some time for reading, maybe with some soothing music in the background. Or listen to an audiobook while relaxing.

41. Connect with a friend.

Call, text, or email a friend to check in on them. For all you know they may need cheering up as much as you do. See if you can surprise them with a coffee/tea or their favorite flower.

42. Practice some positive affirmations.

Affirmations are positive statements about yourself or a goal you want to achieve. Even if the statement isn’t true at this moment, speaking an affirmation out loud cements the idea in your mind and fosters the mindset to make it true.

43. Write a love letter to yourself.

Write a letter to yourself praising all of the wonderful things about you. Write it as though you were writing to someone you deeply care about, and you want them to know how amazing they are. Then read it to yourself as though you received it from a beloved friend.

44. Learn a fun, new skill.

Try out a new skill that isn’t too challenging but just difficult enough that it takes some concentration and focus. This focus puts you into a flow state and prevents you from dwelling on negative thoughts. Before you know it, you’ll be immersed in the skill and forget about your troubles.

45. Write a silly children’s story.

Is there a child in your life? Write an age-appropriate story that he or she will love. Make the child the main character and involve them in a silly adventure or crazy situation. Draw some pictures to go with the story, or if you’re writing on your computer, find some free clip art to illustrate your story.

Did you find some things to cheer you up?

The more you bring joy and comfort to others, the more of both you bring into your life.

Lift others up, and you lift yourself up.

Be generous to others with your time, energy, and other resources, and you become a conduit for blessings — a walking irrigation system.

While helping others, though, remember not to neglect your own self-care needs.

Tell yourself the things you need to hear, especially if no one else will say them.

And don’t let other people’s unwillingness to say those things stop you from becoming who you want to be. You’re the only one responsible for that.

May you allow yourself to shine today and celebrate all that you’ve accomplished so far.

Source link

The post 51 Things To Cheer You Up (Feel-good ideas for a happier you) appeared first on Heal your health yourself.

Moving on from an ex is hard — especially when you still love them.

Whether the breakup was a surprise or not, letting go of your ex and preparing yourself for a life without them may be the hardest thing you’ve ever done.

It’s normal to wonder how to move on from the love of your life, however, you lost them.

You’re not alone.

And you can move on.

Read on to learn how.

How to Move on From An Ex: 13 Ideas to Make It Less Painful

This post is for all who are asking themselves, “Why can’t I move on from my ex?” If this is you, we’re glad you’re here. Take some time to read through all 13 of the following ideas on how to move on from your ex.

Make a note of the ones that stand out for you.

1. Accept what has happened.

Moving on is impossible if you’re still in denial about what happened. You’re not alone if you’re still holding onto the possibility your ex will come back to you. But holding onto false hopes or refusing to accept your ex’s decision to leave is only holding you back.

Until you accept the truth and let go of your ex, you won’t allow yourself to heal or to create a better life for yourself.

2. Talk to someone.

A trusted family member may be able to help you see your situation more clearly, especially one who’s experienced a painful breakup and has moved on from it.

You can also find a therapist or mentor to talk to about what you’re going through with this breakup. Work through the process with someone who can challenge your thinking, support you as you process your loss, and help you see your way forward.

3. Acknowledge the truth behind the breakup.

Moving on requires more than simply accepting the breakup; you also need to acknowledge what led up to it, without judging either yourself or your ex.

Get to the truth of what happened and why the breakup was necessary. If it wasn’t, you’d both be doing everything possible to stay together.

The goal is to learn what you can from the experience, so you can both do better next time.

4. Get some closure.

To get to the truth behind your breakup, you might need to talk to your ex. And you’ll probably hear some things you’d rather not.

Still, it beats wondering…

• Was it something you said or did (or didn’t say or do)?
• Was your ex attracted to someone else?
• Was there anything you could have done to save the relationship?

Don’t argue with your ex, or you won’t learn as much as you can about their perspective on the relationship. You might not agree with it. But if one of you says it’s over, it is.

5. Give yourself some social distance — from your ex.

Once you’ve learned what you need to learn from your ex about their perspective on the breakup and the reasons behind it, give yourself time and space away from them.

• No calls or texts
• No visits or “accidental” meetings
• No social media stalking

You need the social distance to process what you’ve learned and to decide how you’re going to move forward. If your ex sees your relationship as part of their past, there’s no reason for them to have 24/7 access to you in the present.

6. Pursue an interest you’ve put on the back burner.

Is there something you’ve wanted to do but haven’t because your ex wanted you to do something else? Maybe it’s a lot of somethings. Make a list.

Focus on what you’re free to do, now, that you couldn’t do before because your ex (i.e., former partner) discouraged the idea or kept you busy with other things.

Allow yourself to enjoy the freedom to do what you want without feeling guilty about it.

7. Take care of yourself.

Don’t neglect self-care when you’re working through the fallout from a painful breakup. If anything, double down on it. Breakups don’t make you any less worthy of love.

This is not the time to neglect basic hygiene (not that there’s ever a good time for that). Keep that up, and think about something you can do to show yourself some extra TLC.

Tender-loving care does not include going on benders or sobbing loudly outside your ex’s apartment. Think of something your future self will thank you for.

8. Spend time with friends, and meet new people.

Get together with some friends and be open to the idea of meeting new people.

You don’t have to be ready to date; just focus on being good company for your friends. And allow yourself to enjoy theirs.

That said, if you try this and feel incapable of socializing, no one should blame you for leaving early and giving yourself some time alone — or with one friend at a time.

9. Listen to the right voices.

The louder voice in your head right now is probably being a jerk, saying all kinds of unhelpful things. Tell that voice to stuff it. It’s not you. And it’s not telling you the truth. It’s just repeating the same old false beliefs with an extra helping of judgment.

Listen to the quieter, gentler voice behind that one — the inner voice that doesn’t kick you when you’re down. Spend time in the present moment just listening for that voice.

You’ll know it by the peace it brings.

10. Reframe your past.

Moving forward is a lot easier when you can see your past as it is and not as something you have to fix. Try reframing your past in a way that helps you let go of your ex and move on.

Ditch the drama and the self-hating or resentful language and focus on the naked truth of what happened between you, without judging either person.

Change the way you think about the past, and you can change your present for the better.

More Related Articles

37 Fun And Painless Ways To Meet New People

119 Of The Most Positive, Uplifting Affirmations For Women

37 Fun Things To Do By Yourself

11. Let the past go.

Once you’ve reframed your past, it’s time to make your intention to leave it where it is.

Decide to stop yourself whenever you’re tempted to write long-winded monologues about how your ex has done you wrong. Remind yourself that those thoughts are meaningless. Refuse to give them the power to dominate your thinking and keep you stuck in the past.

Then replace them with thoughts that help you heal and focus on the present.

12. Get real with the present.

Your present is where the light is and where you are, and it deserves your attention. Your present is where your focus should be, as much as possible.

We get how tempting it is to wander back to memories you shared with your ex (those you remember with a smile — and others). But it’s time to make new memories, and for that to happen, you have to engage fully with the present moment.

Notice the good things around you and the possibilities each moment holds. Take a moment to savor what you have, and be honest about where you are. Start there.

13. Get ready to rewrite your story.

You’re never too old to make a new start and write a new story for yourself. It doesn’t even have to resemble your past. But it will be influenced by your beliefs.

The good news? You choose what you believe. And if you change those, you can change the way you think — about yourself and everything else. Your beliefs are the foundation of every story you tell about yourself.

Make this one better than the last. Because you can. 

FAQ About Moving On From An Ex

Now that you’ve read through all 13 ways to move on from an ex, let’s recap and tackle some frequently-asked questions.

How do you get over an ex you still love?

The steps are the same as the ones you’ve just read about, but working through them might take a bit longer. Give yourself all the space and the time you need to grieve the loss of someone you love and to get to the truth behind the break-up.

How do I stop thinking about my ex?

You can’t control what your monkey mind will throw at you, but you can control what thoughts you choose to dwell on. So, when you’re tempted to think about your ex, think about something else.

Find new things to occupy your mind. Don’t beat yourself up if your thoughts stray back to your ex, but don’t let those thoughts steal the spotlight, either.

How long does it take to get over an ex you still love?

That depends entirely on you. We don’t say that to make light of your pain but to point out that it’s up to you to decide when you’ll let go of your ex and move on with your life.

That said, don’t compare yourself to others who’ve gotten over their exes more quickly — or those who are still steeped in agony over their loss. Your process is your own. 

No one else can speed you through it or hold you back.

Conclusion

Now that you know how to move on from an ex, which of the ideas described above stood out for you? And what will you do today to help yourself heal and create a life you love?

Source link

The post How to Move on From An Ex (13 Ideas to Make It Less Painful) appeared first on Heal your health yourself.