With the latest Netflix binge show hitting screens, there is not one person who hasn’t heard the name Anna Delvey of late. Anna Delvey first came to my attention years ago when I was scrolling through a news site and came across her story. The pretend German Heiress managed to swindle thousands of dollars from America’s elite, and sure, while I in no way support her methods of making money, I couldn’t help but wonder how she managed to pull it off for as long as she did. But, more than that, I was thoroughly impressed with the belief she had of herself and the ‘fake it till you make it’ approach.

Success or failure

You see, our belief system is the number factor in whether we succeed or fail in our endeavours and life in general. After spending the last few years coaching clients on how to overcome their self-limiting beliefs and harness the power of the mind, it was no surprise when I delved deeper into the brand that has become ‘Anna Delvey’ that I realised she was, in fact, using a similar approach to get to where she wanted to be. And no, I am not breeding a bunch of criminal masterminds to achieve their life goals by engaging in illegal activities through my coaching business.

But credit where it’s due, Anna Delvey had the confidence and belief system that most people can only dream of.

Believe in you

If you want to achieve your goals, you need to believe in yourself and have the confidence to match. An individual who sets a goal for themselves and then quits at first sight of defeat is one who has not yet mastered their belief system. Believing in yourself is the first step to succeeding and living your dream life.

Many years ago, when I was a grad fresh out of university, I wanted to get a job in the field I had studied. Well, surprise, like many other grads, I was forced to take a role in customer service to pay my bills until I could get into my chosen field. My day entailed listening to annoying people whine about anything and everything. I even remember a lady ringing up one day, wanting to put in a noise complaint about children making too much noise playing in their front yard. Who even does that?

Don’t lose faith

While the role I was working in could’ve made me question my existence, I focussed on my bigger goals. I had faith in my ability to get to where I needed to be and knew I would reach my destination. And guess what I did! The same applies to you, do not let temporary defeat ruin your faith or question your capabilities. As long as you focus on the end result and believe in your abilities, you will get to where you need to be.

“Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.” – T. Harv Eker

Let go of your fears

Another barrier to having a solid belief system and succeeding is fear. Fear is the root of all failures and what holds an individual back from achieving their goals. The fear of making a mistake, not knowing how to do something, the list is endless, but your time is not. Richard Branson said: If someone offers you an amazing opportunity and you’re not sure you can do it, say yes- then learn how to do it later. 

And guess what, he’s right.

Do not let fear limit your opportunity to grow. If you choose to let go of the fear that holds you back and take a leap of faith, there are endless opportunities available to you.

Do not let the opinions of others control you

Everyone has an opinion of someone or something; heck, you might even have an opinion of me by the articles I write. Whatever the case may be, it is crucial to have healthy boundaries with those around you, including the faceless trolls on social media if you’re in the public eye. Learn that the opinions that others have of you are built on the image THEY have created of you in THEIR minds. You see, you can’t control what an individual may think of you, but you can control the opinions you have of YOURSELF! So, just like you wouldn’t drink poison and allow it into your body, don’t let the negative thoughts of others into your mind.

You need to focus on your own opinion of yourself and what you can do.

You can achieve great things if you put your mind to it and have a strong belief system, just don’t go around trying to defraud America’s elite of thousands of dollars or try to achieve your goals by other means of illegal activities. One thing is for sure, though, love or loathe ‘Anna Delvey,’ the one lesson you can take away from her is how you can bring your goals into reality with a strong belief system.

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Last year was a transformative one for Ree Drummond aka The Pioneer Woman. The star has lost 55 pounds since January 2021, and has since kept it off after she decided she wanted to start before her daughter’s wedding in May. Little exercise and a hectic work schedule had led the Food Network host to her highest weight ever—but not for long.

In June, she was 43 pounds lighter and explained how cutting calories, building muscle, increasing her protein intake, eating less sugar, eliminating alcohol, logging her weight with an app, and other habits were essential. She admits in a new blog post that she thought it would be a final weight loss recap, but she’s since lost even more pounds and is sharing everything the experience taught her.

Related: Eating Habits to Lose Abdominal Fat As You Age, Say Dietitians

Starting in January, Drummond went all-in and focused on the changes like calorie counting and exercising that once the summer came around, felt like daily life.

“The initial, more intense, stage doesn’t have to last forever,” says she is “glad I’d been so strict for that first stage, because it wound up being a nice crash course that equipped me going forward. Starting out with that discipline actually allowed me more freedom later in the process.”

“I can’t emphasize this enough,” Drummond says in the blog post. “Building muscle—not just the smaller muscles in your arms, but the larger muscles in your legs and butt—will turbo charge your weight loss like nothing else and set you up for more success.”

Moves she says helped burn the most calories in the initial months were squats, lunges, and deadlifts. Good news—these are also some of The 5 Best Exercises to Build Better Glutes, Trainer Says.

Once she started paying more attention not only to what she was putting in her body, but how much, Drummond started breaking the spell. “I trained my body to get used to smaller—well, I should say more normal—portions,” she says noting that a year later she is still “eating all the foods I love, but my body is satisfied with much less of it.”

Although she cut alcohol in the first half of the year, Drummond admits that having a social drink once in a while is not a bad thing at all. She says she swaps sugary, caloric drinks like daiquiris and margaritas and other sweet cocktails for things like Ranch Water—which is clear tequila, lime juice, and sparkling water over ice—or a White Wine Spritzer—made up of a small amount of cold white wine, sparkling water, and lemon slices—because they are more hydrating and help her to not drink as much. Basically, it’s like having “two drinks for the calories of one,” she says.

In addition to building muscle and getting used to exercising, Drummond explains in her blog post that movement every day helped her achieve her goals. After the initial weight loss, she found herself sidetracking from her routine, and was only exercising two or three times a week—but on the days when she wasn’t, she could feel the difference.

“So I made sure to stay more committed than ever to using my standing desk, stepping away for frequent breaks, and putting myself in a position to move more,” she says, noting that little habits like this have stuck. “Today, I’m still using a standing desk and not letting myself collect too much dust during the day.”

The act of stepping on a scale can be triggering, Drummond admits, but seeing the number for her wasn’t about obsessing over each ounce she wanted to lose. “Before I decided to lose weight last January, I don’t think I’d stepped on a scale for two years,” she explains. “I willfully hadn’t weighed myself because I never wanted to know. Without seeing that number go up over time, it was easy for me to tell myself that it was probably just a few pounds.”

Instead, it now helps her identify trends in her body. She includes screenshots of her weight tracking via the Happy Scale app. Here’s what she says about what the habit is like now:

“I’m settling in just below the original goal weight I imagined for myself—which, by the way, was intentionally realistic! I wasn’t striving for pre-marriage, pre-baby, pre-thirties weight! 😊 Just a good weight where I thought I’d feel and look better, and where I felt I’d be able to maintain and have longer term success.”

“There’s nothing on my list of banned foods!” Drummond says about her life after weight loss. Yep—nothing! Like the first lesson she learned, the first few months of 2021 were stricter in terms of her diet of a few sugary foods and no alcohol consumption. Now she follows two thoughts—”First, my portions are much more reasonable. Second, I do still pay attention to the daily proportions I’m devoting to both high protein foods and foods with wasted calories.”

Drummond says in her blog post that she looks at some foods now as calories that aren’t as beneficial and nutritional as others. These “wasted calorie” foods include sugary soft drinks, cookies, cake, potato chips, donuts, and other similar foods. Now she tries to think of eating a “Rhode Island” sized portion of these foods instead of a “Texas” size.6254a4d1642c605c54bf1cab17d50f1e

“Using the doughnut as an example, some days I eat half the doughnut. Some days I decide not to eat the doughnut. Other days I’ll pinch off a bite of the doughnut. Heck, there will be a day now and then when I will eat the whole doughnut,” she says, noting that “There’s no hard and fast rule, but I’m just more mindful of it now.”

While 53-year-old says her daughter’s wedding in May was a great motivational tool for her initial weight loss, Drummond says that being steady with adding in more exercise and controlling portion sizes, and changing how she eats is easier than focusing all efforts on one thing.

“I’ve been able to experience different approaches: building muscle, eating more protein, moving/standing more, exercising on the rowing machine, logging my daily weight, etc.” she explains. Doing this has allowed her more control over the changes that come with life.

The star hesitates to say her weight loss was a “lifestyle change” because she never wanted to change her lifestyle. Instead, she says the experience has been a sort of perspective shift on portion sizes, movement, protein intake, and more, as she sees those things differently a year later.

She then shares a before and after picture, not to label one as “bad” and the other as “good”, but because “it is helpful for me to see the distance I’ve come, and to know that the changes have been good for me,” she says.

Her lifestyle is the same—she is doing the exact same things every day like “living on the ranch, filming my cooking show, working on cookbooks and my product line, and being a wife and slightly weird mom” as she was a year ago. The only difference is her weight loss and the lessons she has learned!

“Today I feel stronger, more in balance (both physically and mentally), and I have more spring to my step. I am wearing clothes I wasn’t comfortable wearing a year ago, I feel better about the way I look, and I’m smiling more,” she ends the post staying. “But to come full circle…it hasn’t changed my life itself. I still have cow manure in my yard, for example. It’s on top of snow, and it’s ruining the dreamy winter vibe. 😂 Gotta go clean that up now, but at least that’ll help me get out and move!”

For more, here are 15 Underrated Weight Loss Tips That Actually Work.

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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The year 2020 has been full of ups and downs. And it is something that this generation has never been through before. And like most people, I put a lot of effort into planning, organizing, and setting goals for everything I wanted to achieve. The beginning of the year 2020 was great until the pandemic hit, everything changed.

I remembered vividly that my country went into lockdown and life has never been the same since then. What is crazier is that even up to this point, as I’m writing this article, things are yet to get back to normal. But that’s life. For some, 2020 was a great year with exponential growth, especially for the health and medical industry. But for most people, 2020 was gone for good.

The year 2020 may or may not be an amazing year for you but, the good news is that it’s over. And like everything that happens in life, we need to learn the lessons, gain the experience, and make progress and make this new year a better year.

So, I’m going to share the 10 life lessons that life has taught me in 2020 and how you can learn the insights and make your coming days better…

1. Life has no guarantee

We don’t have the crystal ball to predict the future, and there is no guarantee that things are going to work out according to your plan. Nobody expected 2020 to happen this way. It is something totally new and unexpected. The same goes for life. There are no guarantees. You can start a restaurant business today and the next day, you will have to close it because of the lockdown due to unforeseen circumstances. Hence, do your best and prepare for the worst. Accept the fact that there is no guarantee in life.

“Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.” – Dr. Seuss

2. Planning is still important

While it is true that nothing is guaranteed, but you still need to plan for what you want. Dwight D. Eisenhower once said, “Plans are nothing; planning is everything.” The key is planning, not the plan. When you plan for what you want, you can become better when things happen. Not only that, you become more proactive when you have a plan. You know what to do and what matters most. Thus, making you productive and giving you a sense of direction in life.

3. You are your best investment

If you didn’t do well in 2020, it is time to up your game. Remember that you are your best investment. Hence, work on improving yourself. Read more books, improve your skills, and increase your knowledge so that you can become a better person in your career, business, family, and life.

4. Acquire knowledge and skills, not stuff

Yes, stop collecting stuff that isn’t important to you. Instead, work on collecting knowledge and experience that truly matter. You will notice that on the brink of death, material possessions aren’t the most important to you. You can have the goal of owning a sports car, but with the lockdown, you can’t even drive the car to impress people who don’t really care about you. Don’t work on acquiring stuff. Instead, pursue knowledge, skills, and work on experiences that grow you.

5. Take full responsibility

If you are out of business or lose your job because of the pandemic, there are only two things you can do: blame or take the responsibility to become better. You see, when you blame the pandemic for causing you to lose your business, there is nothing you can do about it. But instead, if you take full responsibility and learned the lessons, you will become more resilient and gain a better experience. The key is to take responsibility and heed the lesson. Perhaps, life won’t be as difficult if you have enough savings and don’t spend all your money on unnecessary stuff. That’s the responsibility you need to take.

6. Pursue your goals and what matters to you

Things can change and become unpredictable, but you can still choose to work on what matters most to you. By now, you should know that you can’t rely on just one source of income. If you do, you could lose your main income source if you get retrenched. Hence, live a portfolio life. Pursue a few passions and work on a side hustle that makes you feel excited.

7. Save and invest for your future now

Your future is created today, not 20 years from now. Hence, if you want to have a better future, you need to work on it right now. This is especially true when it comes to saving and investing. Time is your ally and you want to make the best use of it. Put aside a portion of your income for savings and investment. When the time comes, you will be glad that you have savings to at least cover a couple of months of your expenses.

8. Take care of yourself

What is important is to learn to take care of yourself. After 2020, most people only started to realize that their health is their most important asset. You see, if you don’t have good health, you can’t enjoy your wealth and life at all. The key is to learn to take good care of your health and so you can have the energy to pursue what matters to you, to live life, and to enjoy it.

“Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.” – Brené Brown

9. Always count your blessings

No matter what happened, count your blessings. You can choose to focus on what you lack, or you can choose to focus on what you have. The choice is yours. There is a saying, “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” So, it all depends on how you look at things in life. You can choose to focus on what can go wrong or think about what can go right. Of course, when you choose to think about the good in every situation, life becomes lighter and brighter.

10. Enjoy the journey

Regardless of how 2020 turned out for you, it was the past and has gone down in history. There is nothing you can do to change it anymore. Therefore, learn to enjoy the journey and the days that are coming your way. The year 2020 may not be a great year for you, but the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it. Remember, life is like a roller coaster. It has its ups and downs. And it is your choice to scream or to enjoy the ride. 

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Like me, many of you have YouTube channels that are sitting around collecting dust because we just didn’t know what to do with them. Afterall, being a content creator and YouTuber is hard work and it can amplify all this is good or bad in your life. My channel has been around since 2008 but I didn’t know anything about sharing a message because I didn’t think I had one. But once I started to go all-in on my channel, I started to learn a few hard, but necessary lessons about what it takes to grow into the kind of person who has a successful business and channel.

The process of content creation can reveal a lot about a person and how they view the world. So it’s no surprise that really starting a YouTube channel challenged me and my low self-esteem. After all, what was my message? Why would anyone care to watch me? 

Here are three of the lessons I learned from going all-in on my YouTube channel:

1. It’s not about me

This is one of the hardest lessons in life for people to learn. I’m one of those people. Perfectionism and other variations on anxiety would have us think the success of our content, in whatever form, is about us, the creator. It’s really not. While content may be the way we express our message, we are the messenger, not the message. By taking the message off of myself, I am better able to answer viewer questions and truly provide the kind of content people are searching for online.

“Content that serves is content that sells.” – Marie Forleo

2. No one cares who I am

This lesson hurt deeply, I’m not going to lie. We live in a very self-centered society where voyeurism and reality would have us believe that our everyday lives are interesting enough to build a successful business. The harsh reality is that no one knows who I am and I’m not famous enough for anyone to really care what I do on a daily basis. That’s why new YouTubers with vlogs and bloggers with lifestyle blogs find it hard to gain success faster than other content creators. Consumers are online to find solutions to their problems. Yes, they want to be entertained as well, but you’ve got to solve their problems.

Many famous YouTubers with vlogs or those with reality TV shows are people with some kind of influencer or celebrity status already. There is something truly unique about them which draws in the audience. They didn’t start that way though. These people started by building a brand around one thing they were good at and serving one audience really well. Only after you’ve done all of that do you get the privilege of talking about whatever you like and have people actually care about what you had for breakfast or what you eat in a day.

When you create that video about reviewing the latest product my audience is searching for information about, I understand they may not know me, but they know the product. By leveraging the name recognition of the product I’m reviewing or the celebrity I’m about to disagree with or book I’m going to review, I create a win-win situation. I get the views (and maybe subscribers) and they get answers to their questions. Everyone is happy.

3. Serve the audience

The final piece of the puzzle is likely the most important. As I’ve said before, no one really cares about me because they don’t know me. It’s not because I’m not a person of worth, it’s just that the viewer has a problem and they are looking for a solution, not my musings on the latest Nike shoes or the shenanigans of my dog.

As content creators and business owners, we have to remember that our job is to serve. If we aren’t offering a solution to someone’s problem, what are we doing? YouTube is a search engine and people are looking for answers to specific questions. By providing those answers, you can increase the opportunity for them to get to know you, like you, trust you, and then buy from you.

“We need to stop interrupting what people are interested in and be what people are interested in.” – Craig Davis

Serving the audience is really about looking outside of yourself and not creating selfish content. It is not my job to create content I want to see, but rather create the content that my audience is looking for. What keeps them up at night? Why are they online searching for answers? Certainly I can weave in my story and message within those answers, but the content must first and foremost serve the audience. Without an audience you are just shouting in a vacuum.

And while I’ve had to refocus my YouTube channel many times, the only reason I haven’t been consistent in content production over the last 4 years is because I took the focus off of the audience and put it on me. While I would love to have a successful business and have my YouTube channel be a part of that equation, I have to remember to serve first.

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