You can’t really force someone to do something.

Sure, you may wish that you could sometimes. But trying to do that only tends to drive them away and push you further from what you want.

So in this post I’d like to reinforce that and mention more helpful and healthy alternatives by sharing the best 45 never force anyone to talk to you quotes.

I hope this post will help you see how futile it is to try to force something and what you can do instead. And, perhaps even more importantly, what you can do when someone else is trying to force something – words, actions, thoughts – upon you.

And if you want even more motivational quotes to help you to move out of a negative situation then check out this post with quotes on dealing with toxic people and this one filled with quotes on not settling for less than you deserve in life.

Never Force Anyone to Talk to You Quotes and Sayings

“Don’t force people to love you, to chat with you, to talk with you; it’s a sign to know who is the right person for you. The right person always finds a way to connect with you.”
Neha Jha

“If you wanna talk to me then that’s cool. If you don’t wanna talk to me then then I won’t force anyone to talk to me. I’m cool either way.”
Unknown

“Don’t force anyone to talk about how they are feeling or to tell you something. Just give them their space and time and if they feel like telling you then they will tell you on their own.”
Neha Maurya

“The more you try to impress, the more you become depressed, and the more they get tired of your coercion. It doesn’t make them love you, instead, they’ll see you as a little child, trying to draw a senseless picture on a piece of paper, begging people to look at it and admire it by force. You can persuade someone to look at your face, but you can’t persuade them to see the beauty therein.”
Michael Bassey Johnson

“Don’t force someone to talk to you… If they really want to… They will…”
Maharatan Kumar

“Don’t force anyone to talk to you. How do you feel when someone does that to you? Why would you want to do that to someone else (or think it would work)?”
Unknown

“You can’t force someone to keep their word, or to communicate, or to realize that something special is in front of them.”
Keyshia Cole

“If it comes, let it come. If it stays, let it stay. If it goes, let it go.”
Nicholas Sparks

“You can’t force raging water to be calm. You have to leave it alone and let it return to its natural flow. Emotions are the same way.”
Thibaut

“Like anything, you don’t force kids to cook. It just becomes a part of life – have them be around it, keep them informed – talk about it. I try to relay my passion for it in these ways. The second you try to force anything on your own kid, they rebel.”
Tedd English

“There are people who can walk away from you… let them walk. I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you… Your destiny is never tied to anybody.”
Td Jakes

“Never force yourself to have a space in anyone’s life because if they really know your worth, they’ll surely create one for you.”
Unknown

“You will never gain anyone’s approval by begging for it. When you stand confident in your own worth, respect follows.”
Mandy Hale

“In a healthy relationship you respect each person’s right to decide and act as they deep down feel is the right thing. If someone is trying to force small or bigger things over and over – perhaps especially in a romantic relationship – then that’s a warning sign.”
Unknown

“If you walked away from a toxic, negative, abusive, one-sided, dead-end low vibrational relationship or friendship – you won.”
Lalah Delia

“In life don’t force anyone to talk to you… And don’t neglect anyone who always wants to talk to you.”
Asmita

“I don’t like forced conversations, forced friendships, forced interactions. I simply do not force things. If we don’t vibe, we don’t vibe.”
Unknown

“Life is too short to waste time waiting for other people’s approval on how you live it.”
Steve Maraboli

“Don’t try to force anyone to talk to you. It can be difficult for them, they might be shy. Give the other person space and know that you cannot control everything in this world. Realizing that will alleviate stress, foster healthier social skills and can help improve your or someone’s mental health.”
Unknown

“Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change.”
Shannon L. Alder

“Don’t force pieces that don’t fit. Have a whatever happens, happens mindset instead.”
Unknown

“Observe the behavior of the butterfly, and chase no one, for they will only elude you.”
Michael Bassey Johnson

“Trust yourself and walk away from situations and people that don’t have your best interest at heart.”
Ben Ruston

“It’s not always about you. Sometimes people are emotionally unavailable because of someone else or a situation they are going through at the moment. So don’t force interaction, don’t force communication if that’s simply not an available choice for the other person right now.”
Unknown

“Dignity will only happen when you realize that having someone in your life doesn’t validate your worth.”
Shannon L. Alder

“The two of you may have been on the same page in the past or may be in the future. But for now, move on.”
Unknown

“The moment you feel like you have to prove your worth to someone is the moment to absolutely and utterly walk away.”
Alysia Harris

“Don’t force someone to talk. When a message pops up on their mobile screen and they reply to everyone else’s message but not to yours. It means they are just finding a way to get rid of you and you’re forcing them to talk with you. Let them go! Set them free. Leave them alone! Find time for someone else who has time for you.”
Unknown

“I realized that there was no point or sense in chasing after happiness that had perished.”
Mikhail Lermontov

“Don’t force someone to remember you all the time. Just stay silent and let them realize how they will be without you in their life.”
Unknown

“What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others.”
Confucius

“Be the better person. Stop wasting any more time on toxic relationships. On fake friendships. Do it for yourself and for your self esteem. Because a brighter future awaits if you start moving towards it.”’
Unknown

“I don’t force it. If you don’t have an idea and you don’t hear anything going over and over in your head, don’t sit down and try to write a song. You know, go mow the lawn… My songs speak for themselves.”
Neil Young

“Before you look for validation in others, try and find it in yourself.”
Greg Behrendt

“Remind yourself that if you matter to someone then they will always make time for you. And remember to treat the people you love the same way and don’t take a relationship for granted.”
Unknown

“I would say that if you don’t feel like talking to the crowd something is wrong and if you force yourself to talk to them things will happen and to that extent things aren’t choreographed.”
Leo Kottke

“Never force anyone to talk to you. It’s a sign of your own self worth if you try that and there are few things that put people off more.”
Unknown

“Learn to walk away from the arms where you don’t belong before you end up suffocating there.”
Sai Pradeep

“Be a bit of a challenge; not because you’re playing games but because you realize you’re worth the extra effort.”
Mandy Hale

“He who seeks only for applause from without has all his happiness in another’s keeping.”
Oliver Goldsmith

“Never force anyone to make time for you, if that person really wants to talk to you or spend time with you, they will.”
Unknown

“The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.”
Ernest Hemingway

“Don’t force anyone to talk to you. I’ve had my fair share of such emotional abuse and it always makes me back away. It is not in your best interest so just forget about it and let the person have a bit of space and decide if they want to engage.”
Unknown

“Our patience will achieve more than our force.”
Edmund Burke

If you liked these never force anyone to talk to you quotes then share them with a friend or family on social media or via email.

Want even more motivation and inspirational quotes? Check out this post with inspiring quotes about positive energy and this one about knowing your true self worth and value.

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Communication is vital.

Without it, we humans would never have been able to coordinate efforts and build –.well, civilization itself!

However, just as you cannot force someone to love you, pushing folks to speak with you is also problematic.

Caveats, of course, abound.

But as an everyday, general rule of thumb, coercing anyone into doing something they don’t want to do is often unhelpful.

Today, we’re breaking down 13 reasons why it’s a bad idea to force people to talk to you.

What Is a Forced Conversation?

As the name suggests, a forced conversation is one you don’t want to have.

Since it’s something you’re doing against your will, it may make you feel:

• Disrespected
• Awkward
• Anxious
• Unimportant
• Unloved

Sometimes, forced conversations occur when one person has an unreciprocated romantic interest in the other party.

Other times, they can happen with a colleague, friend, or family member about a challenging or uncomfortable topic.

Should You Force Someone To Talk to You When You Really Need To Talk?

Whether it’s appropriate to force someone to talk to you is situationally dependent. For example, if you’re going through a difficult time, in most cases, it’s perfectly reasonable to expect close friends and family to support you and engage in conversations with you.

But compelling acquaintances, objects of your affection, or people you casually date to bear the burden of your personal challenges can be inappropriate. In those situations, it’s unacceptable to force someone to talk to you.

Not only does it create a cringe-worthy situation, but it has the power to diminish their opinion of you.

13 Reasons You Should Never Force Anyone To Talk to You

Communication is an art that involves analyzing several verbal and non-verbal cues. Part of the craft is determining when to broach certain topics and when you should let sleeping dogs lie.

So to sharpen your skills, let’s look at 13 reasons it’s not wise to force people to speak with you.

1. There May Be Mental Health Considerations

Thankfully, taboos against mental health issues are slowly eroding, yet many people still feel uncomfortable opening up about their conditions and struggles.

If someone doesn’t want to speak with you, it could be because they’re working through something, and the last thing you want to do is overburden them with pestering. It’s unkind, and it could be detrimental to their health!

2. It Can Be Rude

Everyone isn’t for everyone. You don’t have to like every person who crosses your path, and they’re not obligated to like you!

Such is the way of the world, and when you try to force conversations with folks who aren’t feeling your vibe, it can come across as rude and embarrassing. 

So save yourself the potential shame and keep moving. You’ll eventually find people with whom you fit. Besides, people who snub others usually aren’t worth the effort.

3. It May Put the Other Person in a Bad Situation

We rarely — if ever — know the inner workings of peoples’ lives, and in some instances, demanding a forced conversation could put them in a difficult — or even dangerous — situation.

What if they’re in a fraught relationship that they’re trying to end? What if their partner sees your communications and accuses them of cheating?

You never know what’s happening behind someone else’s curtain, so don’t push.

4. Unknown Circumstances May Be Preventing the Other Person From Talking to You

Unknown circumstances may prevent the person with whom you’re trying to speak from doing so.

What if they had a death in the family, and you’re aggressively blowing up their spot when they’re grieving with their family? Imagine if they were in a car accident and fighting for their life in a hospital bed.

The possibilities are endless.

And who knows, if you let it rest, they may circle back to you in a few weeks or months and explain why they couldn’t talk when you wanted.

5. The Conversation Won’t Be Satisfying to Either Party

Forced conversations are always awkward and uncomfortable — without exception! Even if you manage to get the person to sit down for a chat, there’s a 100% chance it won’t be a productive discussion. So why bother?

6. Time Is Precious

Life is finite. Time is precious.

Please don’t waste it trying to win over people with whom you don’t naturally click. Instead, spend your hours and days showering your loved ones with kindness, working on yourself, learning new things, and meeting new people.

7. Forcing Anything Weakens the Relationship

Don’t force anyone to do anything.

Generally speaking, it’s a good rule. After all, do you appreciate it when people try to twist your arm? Besides, forcing anything engenders mistrust and apprehension, weakening the relationship.

8. You Risk Damaging Your Self-Worth

Groveling and desperation are a turn-off, and people who do it sacrifice their reputations.

We probably could do some societal work on this front. Belittling, demeaning, or gossiping about people who are struggling is fundamentally unkind — but all too common; after all, people may be needy because they’re hurting.

But unfortunately, we’re not there yet. So when you try to force other people to do anything, they’ll judge you and may treat you harshly because of it, ultimately eroding your sense of self-worth.

9. You Cannot Force People To Love You

Understanding that you cannot force people to love you can be a hard lesson to learn, but it’s also one of the most important. It often goes hand-in-hand with discovering that infatuation isn’t love — and neither is lust. 

It’s crushing when you like or care about someone, and they don’t feel the same way.

But the best way to get over it is to wallow with your friends and move on. Don’t reduce yourself to desperate clinging. The blunt and hard truth is that people will mock you for it.

More Related Articles

Signs Of An Emotionally Unavailable Woman

15 Signs Of Emotional Detachment In A Relationship

10. People Prefer Mystery

Mystery is one of life’s great spices — especially in the early stages of romantic relationships. It may sound counterintuitive, but people crave what they can’t have. Humans love a challenge.

Forced conversations are the opposite of intriguing or tantalizingly elusive. So if your goal is to win someone over, chill out!

11. It Can Be a Form of Emotional Abuse

In worst-case scenarios, forcing someone into a conversation can qualify as emotional abuse — especially if there isn’t a way for them to refuse your advances or escape.

Respect other peoples’ space, which includes mental space.

12. You’re Not on the Same Page

When one person wants to engage in a specific conversation and the other person doesn’t, the two parties are not on the same page.

In such situations, it’s nearly impossible to change the other person’s mind, and rehashing the same points only entrenches the discord.

13. It Can Cause a Bigger Fight

If the forced conversation is about resolving a disagreement, talking it out when the other person isn’t ready almost always widens the divide.

So let it rest for a bit. Put some time and space between you and the person you’re beefing with. It could make things easier when you finally sit down and talk things through.

What To Say to Someone Who Doesn’t Want To Talk To You?

What if you’re on the receiving end of a snub? What if you’re the person that people don’t want to speak with?

For starters, try not to internalize it. You may very well be in the right. But also refrain from causing a scene or getting overly emotional. Instead, consider saying:

• “I didn’t realize I was disturbing you.”: This is a good way to make a graceful exit without apologizing. After all, you may have done nothing wrong.
• ”I’m sorry; I don’t want to upset you, so I’ll leave.” If you have been overly forceful and genuinely feel remorse, it’s appropriate to apologize.
• ”I’m disappointed you don’t want to talk; hopefully, we can find another time to discuss things when you’re ready.” This approach works well when there is a genuine issue that needs addressing.
• ”It hurts my feelings when you treat me this way, but I respect your position.” By taking this approach, you’re honoring both your feelings and theirs.
• Don’t say anything. Just exit the situation, and if necessary, never look back.

Some Caveats About Forced Conversations

Advising people to “never force anyone to talk to you” is a sweeping generalization that comes with several caveats. 

As we mentioned above, it’s OK to put a little pressure on family and friends when you need help or want to clear the air about something. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “Hey, [Mom / Dad / Friend], I’d appreciate it if we could sit down and talk some things through.” 

Constantly brushing issues under the carpet is not healthy, and it could ultimately ruin your relationship because problems fester in the dark.

Moreover, progress — on all levels — is a process of overcoming challenges, and doing that always involves hard conversations, both with other people and ourselves. Growth would be impossible if everyone clammed up constantly and refused to discuss uncomfortable issues.

Life is beyond complicated, and emotions are often inexplicable. So when navigating conflicts with loved ones, do your best to respect their boundaries and needs. 

The key is finding an equitable communication balance that will keep your relationships functional, thoughtful, and healthy.

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Do you ever find yourself in that dreaded situation where you’re face-to-face with an acquaintance or stranger, and you’re forced to make some kind of conversation?

Whether or not you were expecting to be with this person, you’re now stuck in the moment trying to come up with small talk topics and struggling to know exactly what to say.

How was your weekend? What do you think about the weather? Do you have any plans for the summer?

The prospect of having these short conversations can lead to anxiety, as you try to straddle saying enough while not saying the wrong thing.

Let’s review some small talk topics you can bring up in these uncomfortable situations that will seem neither forced nor awkward.

What is small talk?

Small talk is the polite (and sometimes superficial) conversations you have during social interactions.

When you engage in small talk, you generally address unimportant and non-controversial subjects, and the conversation doesn’t often veer into more profound or deep topics.

These kinds of conversations happen between people who aren’t particularly close to each other — such as two guests at a dinner party or a coworker on the elevator.

With small talk topics, people are aiming to find points of genuine agreement with someone they don’t know well enough to delve into more substantive conversation.

While this idle chit chat doesn’t convey important ideas or engage your analytical mind, that doesn’t mean it’s not important. It serves a social function of bonding over information.

What are examples of small talk?

Let’s say you’ve been invited to a party by a friend (Sarah). You don’t know anyone except Sarah who introduces you to a new person named Jim. Here’s how to talk small talk when you meet someone new:

You: Hi Jim, it’s nice to meet you.

Jim: Good to meet you, too.

You: So, have you known Sarah a long time?

Jim: Yeah, we’ve worked together for a few years.

You: Oh yeah? Are you in marketing as well?

Jim: No, I’m in IT, but I coordinate with Sarah’s team a lot. How about you? What do you do?

You: I’m in marketing, too, for a sports radio station.

Jim: Oh cool. That sounds like fun. Did you watch the game last night?

You: Absolutely! It was a nail-biter.

As you see, small talk evolves from one piece of commonality — in this case, the relationship with Sarah. But sometimes the thread of small talk conversation can stall out once you reach a natural ending to the initial topic.

That’s why it’s so valuable to develop your skills and have small talk starters handy when you feel the conversation waining.

Why is small talk an important skill to have?

Research shows that small talk skills are necessary for building connections with other people.

If done correctly, making small talk with someone can lay the foundation for a potential relationship with this person.

It helps demonstrate your communication style, which can be an effective way to develop and extend your personal and professional networks.

Engaging in small talk also makes you likable. People are attracted to those who are confident enough to engage in comfortable conversation.

It is important to remember that small talk isn’t just a method of communication and a way of filling an awkward gap. It’s also a gesture of respect that most people appreciate.

How to Use Small Talk in Conversation

So, how do you make small talk interesting so that the conversation can evolve into a deeper connection. Let’s take a look at some topics and small talk questions you can keep in mind for social occasions.

You might write down some of these small talk tips and keep them in your purse or wallet so you can refer to them shortly before your next interaction with someone.

9 Good Small Talk Topics

Select some of these 9 small talk examples for your next conversation:

1. The Weather

Yes, talking about the weather seems dull, but it is a good neutral topic that everyone can relate to.

Even if the weather isn’t particularly noteworthy at the moment, it can still be a good topic of chit chat. Some things you can say are:

• It’s a nice day, don’t you think? I thought it would rain.
• Looks like you brought the beautiful weather with you.
• Can you believe how cold it is? I thought this was supposed to be spring!

You can also ask someone about the climate in their hometown.

• Is the weather here much different from where you grew up?
• What climate do you prefer? Why?
• If you could live anywhere based entirely on the weather, where would you live?

2. Sports

Some people know about sports than others, so there are some rules of thumb to consider before discussing sports.

You want to know your audience, so this topic may be best for people with whom you have crossed paths in the past. You can also preface the conversation with, “So, are you a sports fan?” or “Did you watch the game last night?”

Having an enthusiastic conversation about your favorite team can be fun, but don’t let it get heated if you and your conversation partner disagree about some aspect of your sports discussion.

If you find the conversation is taking a tense turn, make a quick topic change and find an area where you better connect.

3. Entertainment

Some entertainment subjects that are effective conversation starters and good small talk topics are:

• Movies
• TV shows
• Local restaurants
• Music
• Books

To get ready to discuss these topics, keep up with what is trending and popular in these topic categories. Refresh your memory about the latest book you’ve read and the most recent restaurant you’ve tried.

Ask the other person if he or she has seen any good movies or Netflix series lately or heard any new music that’s worth sharing.

Talk about your book if you think it will interest the other person, or ask if they have read it. This is a quick way to find some common ground.

4. Food

Food is one of the best small talk topics because everyone can relate to it.

Ask people which restaurants in the area they like to frequent and the best dishes that are offered. If they aren’t fans of going out to eat, ask them what (or if) they like to cook.

Or, if you are at an event, say something positive about the food that invites a response. For example, “The wedding cake is gorgeous. What flavor do you think it is?” or “Have you tried the crab cakes? They are the best I have ever had!”

5. Work

Talking about work is a natural conversation starter because most everyone has had a career or is currently working.

Sharing your career backgrounds allows you to find areas of common interest and connection. You may discover you know the same people or that your job responsibilities have some similarities.

It’s also interesting to learn more about a career field you haven’t pursued or experienced before.

Talking about your profession can be tricky, however, because you don’t want the conversation to turn into a boring explanation of what you both do as you watch each other’s eyes glaze over.

Make it interesting and unexpected by asking something like, “What skill do you most often use in your work?” or “What’s your favorite aspect of your job?”

6. Hobbies

Try to learn about the other person’s passions. People are often enthusiastic when talking about the things they love, and this will give you a chance to connect with the person on a more personal level.

Ask how they spend their free time, if they’re taking any classes for fun, or what things they would like to try doing in the future but haven’t had the chance yet.

A small talk example on this topic could be, “What’s the most recent new hobby or interest that you’ve tried?”

7. News and Current Events

An effective way to prepare for small talk in social situations is by reading (or listening to) the news every day.

Stay up-to-date on the happenings in the world and your city. Talk about the new construction project that’s being planned for downtown, the rising costs of traveling, or the recent teachers’ strike.

There is always something going on in the news that is on everyone’s mind. But be sure to stay away from controversial news and divisive political topics that could tank the conversation.

Use current events to build a bridge between you and the other person but not as a way to discover the other person’s political leanings.

8. Family

People commonly ask others about their families. You may ask something like, “Do you have any children?” or “Where is your family from?”

Be prepared to answer these types of family questions as well as ask them. Engaging in small talk about family will help you learn a lot about each other in a short period of time.

You will likely find some common ground here, whether its that you both have an older sister or your parents grew up in the same town.

9. Travel

People love to talk about the places they’ve visited. Ask your conversation partner about her favorite places to travel and what she recommends doing while there. This might help spark your interest for your next vacation.

If you’ve been to the same travel destination, share your experiences and your views of the culture. There are so many topics you can build around a travel conversation, such as favorite restaurants, local interests, sports, language differences. etc.

If the other person hasn’t traveled much, ask about his bucket list travel and adventure ideas.

Now that you know some good topics to talk about for small talk discussions, let’s drill down to some unique questions you can incorporate into the conversation to make it less mundane.

If you want to have more positive and meaningful conversations, it starts with great questions.

15 Good Small Talk Questions

Review these 15 questions to make small talk in a conversation with someone:

1. What is going great in your life right now?

It’s so easy for conversations to turn negative – work’s stressful, the weather is unpleasant, tax season is around the corner. By starting a conversation with a positive question, it can keep moving in that direction.

2. What is the weirdest thing that has happened to you lately?

This is a great way to connect to new people, and with such an open-ended question, they have the room to take it wherever they want.

Maybe they’ll recap an awkward meeting they recently had or they might share a hilarious personal story.

3. What were you like in high school?

When you meet people who are decades out of adolescence, you have no idea who they were during these self-defining years.

Sometimes it may come as a complete surprise that your conversation partner was the class clown, the jock, or a bookworm who spent most of the time in the library.

It’s always fun to be surprised by people’s pasts and to share your own stories from your high school days.

4. What was your first job?

You and your conversation partner may be serious professionals now, but you both had to start somewhere. Take the time to laugh about the movie theater uniforms, paper routes, and cheap mall stores that were part of your first real job.

5. What is the best advice you’ve ever gotten?

Not only will this question help you get to know someone really quickly, but it also allows you to hear some quality advice that you may have never heard before.

6. Which app on your phone do you use the most often?

This is another unique get-to-know-you question that will take people by surprise. But if you think about it, the answer offers you a good peek into their life.

7. What’s a movie you didn’t enjoy that everyone else loved and vice versa?

Find out what makes this person different from the rest and get a viewpoint from someone who has an unpopular opinion.

8. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?

This could get someone talking about some traveling they have done or maybe a hilarious cooking mishap. Either way, it will have them reminiscing about something funny.

9. What is your guilty pleasure?

While people don’t often proudly announce their guilty pleasures, once they are voiced, other people usually follow suit.

Maybe it’s that glass of wine before dinner or taking a 15-minute break for a cat nap during the workday.

If you can find common ground with someone on their guilty pleasure, you just made a great connection.

10. If you could talk to anyone in the world, living or dead, who would it be and why?

What a fun question to ask to get to know someone’s values and interests. Choosing one person out of millions of possibilities forces the speaker to zero in on someone who might be an inspiration, mentor, celebrity, or historic figure.

Understanding why your conversation partner chose the particular person can launch another series of interesting and informative answers.

11. Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert? What preferences make you one or the other?

You may be able to guess the answer to this question just by speaking with this person for a few minutes. However, many introverts have extraverted qualities for short periods of time.

Discovering the answers to these questions can help you better navigate the conversation and know whether or not to keep it light or go deeper. Introverts tend to prefer deeper conversation over prolonged small talk.

12. I noticed that you _____. Tell me more about it.

Take notice of something about the other person. Are they wearing something you like? Did they drive up in a classic sports car? Are they not eating meat? Do they have a cast on their arm? Are they holding a book?

Of course, you don’t want to point out anything unsightly or controversial (ie: a political button), but if you notice something interesting, bring it up and find out more.

13. What made you decide on a career in _______?

It’s fascinating to learn how people landed in the their particular career fields. Some people have had a passion for their careers since they were young. Others fell into their jobs or were pressured by parents or peers to follow a certain path.

The answer you receive can open the door to a longer discussion about the person’s background, education, experience, and interests.

14. Do you have any pets? If so, what kind? If not, why not?

Is this person you’re talking with an animal person? If so, knowing if they are a cat person or a dog person can tell you a lot.

Cat people tend to be more creative and enjoy solitary activities like reading, writing, and gardening. They credit their pet with helping them reduce stress.

Dog people are twice as likely to work in finance and enjoy sports, dancing, and travel. They see their dogs as a means to get more exercise.

If they don’t have a pet, is it because they don’t like animals or because they can’t fit one into their lives right now?

15. What is your biggest pet peeve?

We all have them — that something that really bugs us and yanks our chain. Maybe it’s loud talkers, throat-clearers at the movies, people who interrupt, or someone leaving their dishes in the sink.

If you want to get below the surface of this question, ask your conversation partner why this particular pet peeve bothers them so much. You might find out something much more interesting about his or her personality.

Keeping all of these small talk ideas in mind, what are some things that you definitely want to avoid while engaging in small talk?

You don’t want to find yourself in an awkward situation where there is a silence that you don’t know how to fill because the momentum of the conversation just came to a halt.

Let’s look at some topics that are best left untouched.

9 Awkward Conversation Topics that Are Uncomfortable

As you are considering what to talk about when you’re having small talk, you want to make sure the conversation stays light and relatively uneventful.

You don’t want to cause an argument of any kind or make people want to leave the conversation. What is not an appropriate topic for small talk? To avoid making anyone feel uncomfortable, don’t talk about:

• politics
• religion
• personal finances
• personal appearance
• death or illness
• personal gossip
• offensive jokes
• anything so specific that very few people can relate to it
• topics that are sexual in nature

You’ll know pretty quickly if you’ve veered into a conversation topic that is offensive or questionable if you’re able to read body language and facial expressions.

If you think you might have said something out of line, be sure to quickly repair the damage by saying something like, “I said the wrong thing here, and I apologize. Let’s talk about something else.”

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Do you feel ready to master small talk topics?

Building rapport using casual conversation is a useful tool to have in all areas of your life.

If you want to improve your skills in this area, seek out opportunities to make small talk and approach people as if they are already your friend. This will make talking to them seem a little more natural.

Be curious about the person in front of you and ask them unique questions that they haven’t already answered several times. Stay engaged and add value to the conversation whenever you can.

Whether you love chatting people up or you wish you could avoid it, using these topic tips, conversation starters, and unique questions will help you get the most out of the conversation.

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According to a CareerBuilder survey, of the top 10 productivity killers in the workplace, 7 of them involve too much socializing.

If you have coworkers who talk too much, this probably doesn’t surprise you.

You’re here, now, because you want to know how to deal with people who talk too much — or how to tell someone they talk too much in a nice way.

After all, you still have to work with them.

So, why not make it easier?

7 Ways to Deal with Annoying Coworkers Who Talk Too Much

Talking too much at work has real consequences for everyone involved.

Read through the following tips on how to improve your work situation for everyone. Make a note of those that stand out for you as most relevant or helpful.

1. Put on your at-work face (or use a “Do Not Disturb” sign).

This probably won’t be enough for those who think, “Oh, but we’re friends, so they won’t mind if I pop in to say Hi.”

The problem? They start with “Hi,” and several minutes later, you realize you haven’t gotten any work done. And they’re showing no signs of wrapping things up.

You’re allowed to hold up a finger and let them know you’re in work mode right now but will talk to them later. You can even put up a sign that advertises the times when you’re able and willing to socialize.

2. Look for the good in them — but be clear about what you need.

Not everyone can read body language or facial expressions. And those who miss them aren’t necessarily more selfish or inconsiderate than the average person. They might just not realize how their tendency to chat nonstop affects the people around them.

Find something positive to appreciate in them before you interrupt their monologue. Then be clear about your need to get work done, while letting them know you look forward to catching up when you’re off the clock.

Your coworkers don’t need to be coddled with a compliment every time you need to bow out of a conversation. But keep their more endearing qualities in mind.

3. Explain how their interruptions and excessive talking is affecting you.

You have limited time to get your work done. And when you’re on the clock, you want to be as efficient and focused as possible. Any interruptions, however friendly, take you out of the zone and cost you more than the few minutes spent talking.

It takes time to get back into a flow state when someone’s monologue has yanked you right out of it. Let them know how much time these interruptions cost you — without openly blaming them for your compromised efficiency.

They need to know how serious you are about your work-related productivity goals. If this coworker wants to be a friend, they should respect that.

4. Listen for the reason behind their talkativeness.

Sure, some folks talk too much because they honestly see themselves as more interesting than anyone else. They ramble on and on about their journey to self-discovery, while remaining blind, deaf, or indifferent to the struggles of those around them.

But most of those who go overboard with talking do so for reasons like the following:

• They don’t like what they’re feeling and use talking to block it out.
• They’re nervous — and when they get nervous, they overshare.
• They’re insecure and feel the need to “mansplain” to reassure themselves.
• They’re naturally talkative and largely unaware of how that affects others.

Listen for what’s behind the chattiness before you jump to conclusions about your coworker. It might not be about their ego.

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5. Ask if you can interrupt.

Politely ask if you can interrupt them, especially if they’re jumping from one tangent to another. If they insist on finishing to make their point clearer, you can say, “Oh, I thought you’d already made it. Let me just repeat what I’m hearing so far.”

Once you’ve started talking, if they interrupt or talk over you, tell them you’d like to finish your thought. Make it clear you understand what they’re saying (in a few words).

If you’re going through (or have gone through) something similar, you can take a moment to briefly share or allude to that. Then let them know you’ll be able to talk more later — after you’ve had a chance to get your work done.

6. Set boundaries and enforce them.

You’re allowed to have boundaries and to enforce them without coworkers abusing you for it. You’re not “antisocial” if you choose to do work (instead of socialize) when you’re on the clock.

It doesn’t mean you can never talk when you’re working, but it does mean that talking shouldn’t compromise your productivity and your attention to detail.

Coworkers who don’t respect your need to get work done well and in a timely manner create problems for everyone. It’s not on you to make them feel as if listening to them is your number one priority.

7. Talk to your manager.

If a coworker keeps violating your boundaries — expecting you to make an exception for them, because “I thought we were friends” or “This is work-related!” — it may be time to discuss the situation with your supervisor.

After all, they’re invested in making sure everyone is doing their job. You’re not doing this to get your chatty coworker in trouble. A good supervisor will want to address anything that makes the work environment more stressful than it has to be.

Ask for their help in dealing with this. They may have a solution you haven’t considered.

What is excessive talking a symptom of?

Talking too much can be a symptom of more than one possible cause:

• Insecurity
• Nervousness
• Social anxiety
• Natural chattiness
• Narcissism

To know how best to deal with a coworker who talks too much, look beyond the chattiness to the root cause.

Why do coworkers talk so much?

Now that we’ve identified possible causes for excessive chattiness, it’s up to you to get some clarity on which one is the best fit for a coworker you have in mind.

The better you know that cause, the easier it is to know how to deal with them.

You’ll respond differently, for example, with a coworker who’s a narcissist than you would with one who gets chatty when they’re feeling nervous or overwhelmed.

With the latter, you’re more likely to be patient and to look for ways to help them feel calmer.

How do you ignore annoying coworkers?

If you have a coworker (or coworkers) who continually push against your boundaries, ask your supervisor about wearing noise-canceling headphones (if the job allows) to make it easier to tune out chatty coworkers.

Keep those above you aware of the situation and ask for their help in dealing with it. They want the workplace to run smoothly — with happy, efficient employees — so they’ll want to know if something is making that more difficult.

Conclusion

Now that you know how to deal with coworkers who talk too much, which of the tips listed above stood out for you? And what will you differently the next time a chatty coworker interrupts your workflow?

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Children don’t always act delicately when confronted with a new situation or something they’re unfamiliar with. You can remedy this reaction by preparing them ahead of time and teaching them things they may not have been knowledgeable about, such as the different disabilities people may have.

By guiding your child to a more empathetic mindset, you’re preparing them for the differences and diversities the world has to offer. Fighting against ableist beliefs early creates a kinder generation.

When you don’t have the words to say, discussing sensitive topics, such as ableism, can be difficult. However, you will need to speak to your family about disabilities to learn and grow an empathetic mindset. You can start these discussions in several ways, even when you don’t have all the answers.

1. Have Honest Discussions

Sit your children down and talk to them about disabilities. You can relate the experience of someone you know by using them as an example so kids can better understand. If you don’t have someone in your close circle with a disability, emphasize they don’t inherently make a person different — disabled people have plenty of things in common with everyone else.

You should talk to your children about why it is essential to understand and love people’s differences. Discuss how the world makes it easier for non-disabled people to get around and move forward, while things might be a little more difficult for those with disabilities. Make it clear that disability is neither a bad nor a good thing, just a difference to celebrate and appreciate. By establishing these boundaries, your children will understand that ableist statements are unwelcome.

2. Support Inclusive Places

When you support a restaurant or business that includes options for people with disabilities, both visible and invisible, you’re sending a message to your family that you care about everyone. Your family might ask why you chose to purchase from a particular company, and you can answer that it’s because they care for everyone, regardless of disability status.

For example, when choosing a place to go on vacation, you should opt for a location that supports people with disabilities. Doing so gives your money to a worthwhile business that serves all people, and you have the opportunity to demonstrate to your children how to take action for equality.

3. Turn Experiences Into Opportunities

You should never stifle the curious mind of a child. Your kid is bound to ask a question at an inappropriate time, such as pointing out someone with a visible disability in a store. How you respond to this situation can indirectly teach your child how they should view disabilities. Instead of saying something like, “That’s not nice,” you can explain what you know about the disability.

If you don’t know the answer or want to encourage more discussion, tell your child that you both can ask the person about their disability and hear it from them. If your child approaches someone and asks nicely to hear more about their wheelchair, they may talk about it. If the person says no, you have to remind your child to respect their boundaries and find the answers they seek through another source.

4. Pick Your Language Carefully

Any parent knows that children will pick up everything you say. You should use your words in a way that you wouldn’t mind your kids repeating. When speaking about any topic that requires care, you should choose your words carefully and actively use the proper terminology for what you’re describing. At some point, your kids will likely repeat the words you use, and hopefully, they’ll utilize their knowledge to educate their peers, too.

5. Use Educational Tools

Your children likely consume some form of media every day, whether through books or television. Using it for good and showing your children something educational will expose them to being more empathetic toward others and encourage learning more about people’s differences.

For example, Julia, a character with autism, was added to “Sesame Street’s” cast in 2015. With the addition of this character, the show has opened up an avenue for dialogue about autism and can teach kids directly and indirectly about the disorder.

Similarly, books can teach your children about multiple disabilities and allow you to communicate effectively with your child about a topic you may not have known much about before. Resources exist to help you better teach kids about the world and other people they may encounter.

Teach Your Children to Love Others

Education is key to cutting down ableism before it begins. If a child doesn’t understand something regarding disabilities, do your best to answer their questions and look for supplemental information and advice elsewhere. By teaching your children about the prevalence of ableism and how they can combat it, they’ll be better prepared to enter the world with kindness.

*collaborative post

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I’m a lifer—depression for life. It’s hard to remember a time when I didn’t feel depressed. I was diagnosed for the first time at 14, and so began my journey of medication and therapy.

But I was lucky. At 14, my mother was the one who noticed the symptoms and took me in to the doctor’s office for help. I didn’t have to do that myself. I’ve carried the depression diagnosis (plus more) with me ever since then. It’s just a part of me now.

Not everyone has the luxury of being taken for help when they start experiencing depression. The icy, lonely, isolating nature of the illness makes talking about it feel impossible—let alone talking with a doctor you barely know.

The only way you’ll start feeling better, though, is by asking your doctor for help. If you do have clinical depression, lots of treatment options are available to you. Many who are diagnosed with this condition live happy lives due to successful management of their symptoms.

Symptoms of Depression

It’s normal to be sad, lonely or uninterested in life once in a while. When these feelings last for a long period of time and begin affecting your everyday life, you might be experiencing depression.

According to the Anxiety and Depression Society of America, Major Depressive Disorder affects approximately 16.1 million American adults in a given year. Here are some of the many symptoms caused by depression:

• Extreme fatigue
• Constant sadness
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness or helplessness
• Irritability
• Pessimism and hopelessness
• An “empty” feeling
• Sleep disturbances (sleeping too much or too little)
• Loss of interest in activities you enjoy

If you notice you’ve been feeling one or more of these symptoms for a long time, don’t brush them aside. Get yourself some help.

Why You Should Ask for Help

Depression isn’t something you can just talk yourself out of. If you’ve been experiencing strong negative feelings for a long time, they’re not going to disappear with the snap of a finger. 

Clinical depression causes physical and emotional symptoms that can get in the way of a successful life, or even threaten your life. Most of the time, someone diagnosed with depression needs medication, therapy or both to manage their symptoms and feel better.

Nobody should go through the isolation of depression alone, without help. The first place to start is your family doctor or general practitioner. These guys are your first line of defense against depression.

Your doctor can run tests to find out if a physical condition is causing your symptoms. He can also get you started on medication and refer you to other specialists if necessary.

Opening up Is Hard

Depression is a tricky monster because the disorder itself can make asking for help seem impossible.

Depression has a funny way of telling me little lies like, “you don’t deserve help,” “you’re just being a big baby” or “your doctor can’t help you with this problem.” It’s really hard to see through these lies and do the right thing to take care of yourself.

You might not be close with your doctor and have trouble opening up about this problem. You’re probably embarrassed to talk about it at all.

I recommend reading up on the illness to prepare yourself. It will help you realize that this is a clinical disorder, that requires clinical treatment.

How to Talk to Your Doctor About Depression

You’ve decided to make some changes and have a talk with your doctor, but you have no idea how to do it. Something as simple as telling your doctor you’re sad all the time feels like baring your soul to the universe.

You might not be comfortable talking about your feelings, let alone with a near stranger. So how do you break through the barriers and get the help you need?

1. Make the Appointment

First, make an appointment with your doctor. This step alone can be terrifying when you’re facing depression. Call your main doctor’s office to make an appointment, and when asked what the appointment is for, simply say “mental health” or something similar.

That’s all it takes to get on the road to recovery. You can also bring up your suspected depression at an appointment for another issue.

2. Start Talking

You’re at the appointment, and now you have to get the words flowing. Start by simply telling your doctor the symptoms that are affecting your life. This will get the conversation started and spark some questions for your doctor to ask you. Some example conversation starters:

• “I’ve been spending too much time sleeping lately. I’ve slept for entire days at a time and missed important events or appointments.”
• “Lately, I’m having trouble making myself accomplish simple things. It feels so draining to do even the most everyday tasks.”
• “I’ve been much more irritable than usual. It seems like every little thing and person sets me off.”
• “It’s been hard to eat lately. I usually have such a great appetite but it’s completely gone.”
• “I’m having trouble enjoying life and feeling weighed down by something. It feels very empty lately.”

It may be extremely difficult to get those one or two sentences out. But if you can get that far, you’ve won half the battle. Now your doctor can take over by asking you more questions and assessing your mental health.

3. Mention Other Symptoms

Now the conversation is flowing, and your doctor is assessing whether or not you might be experiencing depression.

To make the most accurate assessment, your doctor needs to know all your symptoms and history, both physical and mental. This way, she can explore any underlying health issues that could contribute to your depression.

Be sure to mention any of the following, which can help identify underlying health problems:

• All medications you are currently taking
• Family history of mental illness
• Substance abuse
• A chronic illness
• Big life events

It’s best to paint the whole picture so your doctor can screen you for depression with as much information as possible. This will lead to a more accurate diagnosis and treatment plan.

4. Ask Questions

You’ve gotten through the hard part. You’ve taken the most important step and asked for help. Now the conversation should be flowing, and you should make sure to ask questions.

Take control of your health by asking the questions that are surely on your mind. Here are some example questions to ask your doctor:

• “Will I need medication to manage my depression?”
• “Could any underlying health issues be causing me to feel this way?”
• “When do you expect me to begin feeling better?”
• “What should I do in an emergency?”
• “When should I follow up with you?”

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Your mental health is just as important as any other aspect of your health, so it deserves the same amount of attention and care.

What to Expect Next

If your doctor diagnoses you with depression, there are a few treatment routes he may take. First, any underlying health problems will be treated. Then, depending on your type and severity of depression, the doctor may:

• Refer you to a psychiatrist, psychologist or therapist
• Prescribe medication
• Adjust current medications
• Link you with community resources

If you begin taking medication, it’s wise to follow up with a psychiatrist who specializes in mental health medications. That way, you’ll ensure you are taking the appropriate medication and receive care specialized to mental health. Make sure to continue your treatment, even if you’re feeling better.

Living With Depression

Your mental health is as important as your physical health. If you were diagnosed with a heart condition, you’d take medication and see specialists. Why treat depression any differently?

If something seems off, trust your gut and tell your doctor. If you’re still uncomfortable talking about it, bring someone you trust with you to the appointment. They can help explain how you’re feeling to the doctor or just serve as moral support for you.

Your life depends on the proper treatment and management of depression. Seek the help you need and keep faith that you’ll find an effective treatment option.

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