Have you ever had one of those days when it seems like everything is going wrong? 

We tend to blame ourselves during these times and find ourselves thinking, “Is something wrong with me?” 

The answer is no, and you’re not alone in these feelings.

Everyone experiences self-defeating thoughts on occasion.

While these thoughts tend to feel like a black hole, you can pull yourself out of the darkness and recognize that you are okay just as you are.

What’s Wrong With Me – Why Do I Feel Like This? 

It’s no secret – life gets tough sometimes.

When it does, we tend to feel low and engage in unproductive self-talk. We can be our own worst critics and believe everything is our fault.

Understanding why you think this way can help you take the actions needed to change your self-perception.

Here are some of the most common reasons you feel like something is wrong with you. 

1. You’re Overworked

If you tackle too many responsibilities, the natural reaction is to feel overwhelmed. Overworking tends to diminish your energy and motivation. 

When we have low energy and feel exhausted, we are more likely to engage in negative self-talk and thoughts that we aren’t up to snuff. 

If you feel like your plate is full, and you notice you’re getting overwhelmed – pay attention. Give yourself a break to recharge, and your self-defeating thoughts will likely disperse.

2. Perfectionism Is Getting The Best Of You

Perfectionism is a slippery slope. We all want to be the best versions of ourselves, but sometimes you can try too hard to get it all right. 

We beat ourselves up for not doing everything perfectly and think something is wrong when we fall short. Don’t hold yourself to impossible standards. Remember, you’re human, and it is natural to make mistakes. In fact, mistakes help you learn and grow.

3. You Compare Yourself To Others

The grass is always greener on the other side. When we compare ourselves to others, we look at their lives with rose-colored glasses. 

No matter how great they look on the outside, everyone has their battles and deals with self-doubt. In the digital age, it’s easy to look at someone’s social media and assume their life is perfect. 

Remember, people only show what they want you to see, which rarely includes the unpleasant stuff going on behind the scenes. 

4. You  Feel Unfulfilled 

Working an unfulfilling job or being in unsatisfying relationships makes everyone feel off-kilter. If you’re not where you want to be, you tend to believe the problem is you rather than your environment. 

Take a look around you and think about your life. Does it make you feel good, or do you see areas needing serious improvement? If the answer is yes, take steps to improve your life, and chances are you’ll begin to feel there’s not a thing wrong with you.. 

5. You Are Lonely

Humans are incredibly social creatures. We need other people to feel fulfilled and happy. Even introverted homebodies require social interaction. 

Loneliness leads to isolation and even depression that makes us feel down on ourselves. If you aren’t socializing, it’s easy to feel like something is wrong with you. 

Meeting new people is a great way to build your social circle and cut down on feelings of loneliness. 

What is Wrong with Me? 9 Actions to Take When You Feel This Way 

Everyone feels off every once in a while, but we’re here to tell you there is nothing “wrong” with you. It may be hard to convince yourself of this truth when you’re experiencing these emotions. 

But there are some time-tested strategies to help you see yourself in a new light and recognize how very ok you are. 

1. Give Yourself A Break

Sometimes when we are overworked and stressed, our sense of self suffers. We don’t feel good about ourselves and start to doubt our self-worth. We begin to think of things we could have done differently or still need to do. 

Sometimes the best thing to do when you find yourself asking, “Is there something wrong with me?” is to take a break. Whether it’s a walk around the block or deep breaths, these moments are essential for our mental health. 

2. Practice Gratitude

When we feel low, we focus on what we lack and everything we don’t have. Practicing gratitude is one of the best ways to shift our mindset to one of positivity and abundance. 

Gratitude helps ground us and reminds us how worthy we are. Practicing gratitude every day can limit thoughts of self-doubt. It also helps break our cyclical negative thoughts. You can start each day by naming three things you’re grateful for. 

3. Remember The Feeling Will Pass

Whenever you catch yourself thinking, “Why do I feel like this?” it’s best to remember this is your anxiety talking. Anxiety makes you assume your feelings are permanent and will never get better. Take back your power and remember the feeling will pass just as it always has. 

Sometimes when we get caught up in negative self-talk, we have a hard time bringing ourselves back to the center. In these moments, remind yourself about the impermanence of our thoughts and feelings. 

4. Practice A Quick Meditation

Meditation is one of the best things to do when you question what’s wrong with you. Deep and slow breathing signals the parasympathetic nervous system to calm you down. It also helps to slow down the mind and reduce negative thoughts. 

Regular meditation is an excellent tool for staying present and positive. Making it a practice can quash thoughts that something isn’t right with you. 

You can easily find a quick meditation online or on your smartphone so that you can meditate from almost anywhere. 

5. Be Compassionate With Yourself

We can be our own worst enemy. Our self-talk during low points edges on self-abuse. It is not how you’d speak to your friends and loved ones, so why talk to yourself this way? 

If we took a step back and listened to what we say to ourselves when we feel down, we would be appalled.

Try to imagine what you’d say to a friend if they expressed similar feelings about themselves. Encourage and reassure yourself of your greatness and accomplishments. 

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6. Call A Loved One

Reach out to a friend if you’re having difficulty getting out of a negative headspace and feel like something is wrong with you.  

Sometimes talking to someone we care about is enough to pull ourselves out of this space. Expressing our feelings aloud to someone else also helps us recognize how untrue the feelings are. 

Our loved ones also help to reassure us there is nothing wrong with us, and we are just caught up in negative feelings. 

7. Practice Affirmations

Affirmations are a powerful tool for building your confidence and self-worth. If you practice speaking positive affirmations, you’ll be less likely to fall into despair, believing something is wrong with you. 

Find a good list of positive affirmations and choose those that resonate with you. When you have self-doubt, repeat the affirmations that give you a sense of peace and self-acceptance. 

8. Practice Self-Love

Sometimes the weight of our hectic schedules gets the best of us. We balance work, family, household chores, and social events, and our self-care ends up on the back burner. 

Self-love and self-care are so crucial to promoting feelings of worthiness. Make self-love and self-care a priority if you frequently feel down about yourself. It’s as simple as taking 10-15 minutes to stretch and breathe or enjoy a cup of tea with your phone on silent. 

Remember You Are Not Alone

Everyone has negative self-talk at some point every day. We all have far more negative thoughts than positive ones. We may think we are past specific defeating thought patterns only for them to arise again when we feel low. 

When you find yourself ruminating about what is wrong with you, remember you are not alone with these feelings.

There is nothing wrong with you, and these feelings will pass. But it’s validating to know other people experience these types of thoughts – even people you may think have it all.

If you frequently think, “What is wrong with me? Why am I like this?” – keep this list of strategies handy. Remember to give yourself a break and be kind to yourself in these moments. 

Deep breathing, meditation, gratitude, and reaching out to friends are all simple actions. When you practice them regularly, you’ll notice you feel more is right with you than wrong. 

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I went to a modern art museum once with a friend who was also an artist. We were looking at, what was for me, a particularly challenging piece of art that was just a giant white canvas with a square of black paint in the middle of it. I asked my friend, “Why would someone do this? What’s the point?” And her simple answer was, “Well, in some cases, just because they can.” In a strange way, that was a satisfying answer to my question.

What’s the point? I love asking that question. The benefits of “What’s the point?” are numerous. It’s a simple and effective way to get to the heart of every issue. It cuts out the noise and essentializes. However, I think if you ask that question of others, sometimes it can come off as somewhat rude. If you are given a task by a supervisor and you ask them “What’s the point?” you might not have that job for very long. If your partner asks you about your relationship’s future over a romantic dinner and you respond with “What’s the point?” you might get a glass of chardonnay in the face. 

No, you need to be judicious when you ask, “What’s the point?” In fact, I would suggest that the best person to ask “What’s the point?” to – repeatedly and intentionally – is you. I’m not suggesting that this question should be asked from a place of futility: you’re not throwing your hands up and saying, “Oh what’s the point?!” Instead, this question is a launching pad for self-assessment. For being honest with yourself about how you spend your time and what value you get out of what you do on a daily basis. 

Why ask this particular question? Because life is short! We have a limited time here on Earth to do what we want to do, so constantly assessing the point of it all, being honest, and then doing something about it, is critical to success and overall happiness. 

There are four places in life where I ask myself “What’s the point?” all the time. While these aren’t the only areas where you can ask this question, they are a great start. I encourage you to ask yourself:

1. What is the point… of my work?

When I started my company, I began with the simple goal of helping people to amplify their voices on social media. Giving our customers a platform to share their stories, services, and ideas is our central goal. However, I constantly need to reassess that goal and ask if we – especially me – are staying focused on that mission. In Good To Great, Jim Collins encourages business leaders to reflect on their company’s core competency and focus relentlessly on that one thing. 

To become great in that one objective is the point. Since most of us spend at least 40 hours a week at work, we should always ask ourselves, what’s the point? If it’s “to make money” or “to put food on the table,” those are valid reasons, but is that enough for you to feel fulfilled? Is work giving you what you need? Does it have a purpose beyond mere survival?

“All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.” – Galileo Galilei

2. What is the point… of my hobbies?

While I used to dance professionally, hip-hop dance continues to be a passionate hobby of mine. What’s the point of a hobby? For me, it’s a chance to get away from it all. Dance provides me an opportunity to disconnect from the day-to-day stresses of life. It allows me to express myself and use my body in a way that sitting at a computer all day cannot. Psychologists agree that hobbies are important for a balanced, well-lived life. What is the point of your hobbies? 

Do you have a hobby? Let’s start there. If you don’t have a hobby and the reason is “because I don’t have time.” then you should return to the question above. Even if you do have a hobby, you should continue to self-assess. Does your hobby still provide you with joy? Relaxation? Or has your hobby become a habit you’re afraid to break? Only you know the answer, but you have to start by asking the question.

3. What is the point… of my relationships?

This is probably the toughest question to ask, because it obviously can affect some important connections you have in life. However, it’s always important to ask. Friendships can become stale and past their expiration date. Romantic relationships can become toxic. Is it time to Marie Kondo some of your relationships and ask if they still spark joy? Friendships/relationships that bring you joy are the ones you keep, but if you are looking at interactions with a particular person and asking repeatedly, “What’s the point?” Then perhaps it’s time to let that person leave your life. Again, I know this is challenging, but remember that the ultimate goal is to be honest with yourself about what’s important to you. 

4. What is the point… of life?

I’m a big lover of life – I can’t help it. Success to me is simply being able to do what I love every single moment of the day and helping others that I love and care about. People are more important than things. I look in the mirror at the end of every day and ask myself if I followed through on actions that allowed me to continue doing what I love. What was the point of today? That little self-assessment at the end of the day gives me the energy to get up the next morning and do it all over again. String a bunch of those little self-assessments, those “What’s the point?” mirror talks together, and you start to put together for yourself a life well lived. 

What’s the point for you?

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When you are going through menopause, it can lead to several changes in your body. One of them may be anxiety. Let’s look at the connection between these two.

Let’s Briefly Look At Anxiety

Anxiety describes our body’s response to a danger. It’s our body’s fight or flight instinct whenever we face something we view as a threat. However, anxiety disorder, which happens when you are having frequent anxiety symptoms, can make it so that you cannot live your life normally. You may become more irrational and think of everything as a threat.

How Menopause Can Cause Anxiety

Menopause may lead to anxiety, and other mental health woes such as depression. Here are some reasons why this happens.

Your Hormones Change

Menopause can bring a massive change in hormones. When your estrogen and progesterone go down, you may become anxious and depressed.

You’re Afraid of No Longer Being Able to Have Kids

If you wanted to have kids but couldn’t, or if you wanted to have another one, menopause or pre-menopause can cause you anxiety. You may feel lonely and empty, and the fact you’re going through menopause can make it worse.

You’re Anxious Of Growing Older

Menopause is the signal that you’re entering middle-age. This can trigger different anxieties. Maybe you start to have an existential crisis and wonder if the career or life you’re living is what you want. Perhaps you dread aging and the eventual end of your life. There are many milestones in life that can make you feel this way, and menopause is just one of them.

Your Self-Image Goes Down

Many women go through bodily changes. They may gain weight, or have thinning hair, and this can lead to self-image anxiety issues, especially if you are mindful of how you look.

We Are Not Allowed To Talk About Menopause

Another reason why menopause causes anxiety is that it’s a bit of a taboo subject to talk about. Even though most women have to go through it, it’s still a subject of embarrassment and fear, which can lead to you having difficulties discussing it.

When you cannot discuss anxiety about menopause, it can make you feel alone and as if you have no one to talk to.

What’s The Solution?

There are several ways you can deal with menopause anxiety. Here are some of them.

Talk To A Support Group

If there are any support groups in your area, you may be able to talk with women who are going through the same thing as you, and it can allow you to realize you are not alone.

Support groups can be in-person, or they can be online communities. The latter especially is prevalent in the age of the pandemic.

Seek Medical Treatment

Some women go to a gynecologist or take medication to help offset the effects of menopause. While menopause cannot be reversed, you can manage its symptoms better through medication. For instance, you may be able to take hormones, or take medication to help with some of the menopausal symptoms. In addition, you may be able to take anti-anxiety medications.

Alternative treatments may be able to help as well. Some women have found help in acupuncture, for example. With that said, these should be used alongside traditional medication, as some of their effects are unproven.

Live A Healthy Lifestyle

Exercising and eating right can help with some of the symptoms as well. You can maintain your weight and feel less anxious through exercise, and some healthier foods may be able to help as well.

You should be doing this in any stage in life, but menopause can make you realize that you aren’t doing enough to keep up your health. Luckily, it’s never too late to go to the gym or eat some healthier foods. Give it a go.

Talk To A Therapist

Finally, the best way for you to be able to manage the symptoms of your menopause anxiety is through therapy. Anxiety can be due to many life changes, and not just because of menopause. A therapist can help you with getting to the bottom of why you’re feeling this way.

If you cannot see a therapist in-person, one solution is BetterHelp. BetterHelp can connect you to an online therapist who will be able to help you improve your life.

Remember, menopause is not the end. You still have a long, fulfilling life ahead of you, and this is only one milestone in that journey. Good luck.

Author Bio

Marie Miguel has been a writing and research expert for nearly a decade, covering a variety of health-related topics. Currently, she is contributing to the expansion and growth of a free online mental health resource with BetterHelp.com. With an interest and dedication to addressing stigmas associated with mental health, she continues to specifically target subjects related to anxiety and depression.

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Nut butters can add an extra dose of flavor to some of your favorite fruits or morning smoothie, and are perfect for a quick on-the-go snack.

Whether you choose peanut, almond, or cashew butter, each type contains a fair amount of good fats and proteins.

But what is the best nut butter for supporting overall health?

With nut butters, not only are you getting unsaturated fat, protein, and fiber, but you are also consuming micronutrients, says Jinan Banna, Ph.D., RD, an Associate Professor at the University of Hawaii at Manoa. “Nut butters include micronutrients like calcium and B vitamins,” she says.

To help find the best nut butter for you, we’ve compared a few of the most popular varieties’ calories, carb count, fat, fiber, and protein.

1. Peanut Butter

A pantry staple, you can find natural peanut butter just about anywhere. It’s also often the cheapest nut butter.

You can also make your own peanut butter at home in five minutes or less.

(If you’re like us and just can’t get enough, check out this list of peanut butter recipes!)

2. Almond Butter

With similar taste and texture, almond butter is becoming a popular alternative to peanut butter.

While it has more fat than peanut butter, almond butter has more fiber and fewer carbs.

3. Cashew Butter

Cashew butter is tasty and creamy, but it’s high on carbs while having the lowest amount of protein compared to other nut butters.

Cashew butter joins hazelnut butter with the least amount of fiber.

4. Hazelnut butter

Hazelnut butter is a lower-calorie recommendation of Banna, as two tablespoons have just 160 calories.

But: Even though it’s delicious, try to skip the hazelnut chocolate nut butter as it contains added sugar.

5. Pistachio Butter

“Pistachio’s colorful green palette is due to its antioxidant properties, so this is an extra benefit of this nut butter,” says Banna.

It also has the least amount of fat per serving of all butters on this list.

6. Walnut Butter

If you’re unfamiliar with this type of nut butter, it’s worth getting acquainted. Walnuts contain omega-3 fatty acids, which studies suggest may provide health benefits.

7. Sunflower butter

OK, so this “butter” isn’t made from nuts. But sunflower butter is a perfect alternative for people with nut allergies.

How to Shop for Nut Butter

You are getting fat and protein with any nut butter, which helps keep you fuller, longer.

However, not all store-bought nut butters are created equal, so make sure you are looking at the ingredient list.

“Nut butters can be a source of good fats, but be sure to choose an all-natural jar without any added oil and sugar,” says Quyen Vu, the Culinary Nutrition Specialist for Beachbody.

For a natural nut butter, the ingredients should be something like “contains peanuts” — and that’s it.

Avoid brands that have added sugars, oils, and salt.

Vu notes, too, that just because something is technically good for you, doesn’t mean you should glob it on everything.

Nut butters are naturally high in calories, so if you are trying to lose weight, eating loads of peanut butter is not the best plan.

Aim for about two tablespoons per serving, which is approximately 190 calories, depending on the exact type of nut butter you are eating.

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